- 6 years ago
- Wedding: July 2012
Fiance and I have been engaged for roughly 5 months, and for about 6 months before that we often ‘joked’ about running off and getting married so I could get his health insurance (I am self employed, and since I have no children the only healthcare coverage I can get now is WAY more than I can afford and has an insanely high deductible). When we actually got engaged, it was because we wanted to get married, the health insurance wasn’t even an issue. (We found out a lot of employers in NYS recognize ‘domestic partners’ so as long as we live together, I’d be covered.) Things were good, and since he started a new job a few months ago we’ve been patiently waiting for his benefits to kick in while planning a big picnic wedding for next Spring (an actual date hasn’t been set yet).
As far as wedding plans go, I feel very behind because we haven’t made a single solid decision, but since it’s very casual (more like a big BBQ in a state park) I haven’t been worried about it. I’ve been back and forth on having a ceremony at the park, on the water (there is a very small grassy area there) or just having a small and private ceremony for us and our family before hand and having the reception for the friends etc. Either way, I’d be happy since I didn’t really care about the wedding part as much as I did the marriage part…I would have been thrilled to go off and do it already, but he’s never been married and wants the ‘party’ part of it.
Yesterday, we found out that his new employer may not cover me until we’re married (he’s supposed to ask this week what their policy is), despite hearing in the beginning that I’d be covered. When we found out, I was SO bummed because I REALLY could use the coverage (it costs me a minimum of $200 per Dr. visit, which is a lot out of pocket)…and my Fiance said ‘Well, I guess we’ll just have to go and do it’ (meaning get married, I verified) and we both felt a little bummed. When we got to talking about it, we both agreed that we have every intention of getting married, so if we had to do the legal part sooner than planned it wasn’t a huge deal, and we’d still have the big BBQ next year and call it an anniversary party or something, and since we aren’t the most romantic of people this really is right up our alley anyway. SO…I might be running off to the courthouse anyway!! It’s up in the air, we said we’d talk about it and REALLY decide after we found out for sure what his job says. We already decided that if we do elope, we’ll tell his best friend and wife, and my parents and 2 siblings (he isn’t very close with his parents, although I’d want to tell them.) My grandparents eloped, as did his parents, so it could be fun to add to our family story.
What do you guys think? Is it ‘crazy’ to run off and elope quickly for the sake of health insurance, since we were engaged anyway??