- 4 years ago
- Wedding: May 2012
Well, I’m on CD126….if the “light period” that I did get in June was even a period at all. It’s been so long that I’m not even sure now that is was a period at all. I’ve stopped temping because it was starting to seem like a waste of time…ie if I’m not getting my period, I really don’t think I’m ovulating. It’s so frustrating to feel out of control of my body, and that charting can’t even help me time BD due to the lack of periods.
I had an appointment with my OB/GYN about two weeks ago, and I told them about all of this. They did bloodwork and my hormone levels were normal/good per the message they left me. I’m not sure if that made me feel better or worse….ie, there’s nothing wrong with my hormones, but somehow I still seem “broken.” I called them back and asked what the next step was, and they said to call at the end of the month if I still haven’t gotten my period so they can give me something to jump-start it (I’m thinking they mean Provera, from my Internet research). But even if they give me Provera to jump-start my period, that won’t jump-start ovulation, right? I would need something like Clomid for that? I’m not sure how much time (of active TTC) would need to elapse before my doctor would prescribe Clomid for me. My doc had mentioned that I might even have PCOS (although I don’t have any other symptoms other than the lack of periods) and had recommended an ultrasound (would love to hear whether other bees think this is something I should do right away, or give more time?) My doctor said that this preliminary stuff will overlap with infertility tests they usually do after a year of TTC.
We’ve been TTC since July, and I realize from reading a lot of these TTC boards that a lot of people have tried for a lot longer than we have. I never thought I’d be one of those people that would constantly think about TTC (or apparently, constantly think about current inability to conceive). Every week, a new friend/acquaintance seems to be pregnant, and while I am genuniely happy for them, it is getting harder to feel like there isn’t something wrong with me, as I am literally the only person I know of (IRL) who had any trouble getting pregnant (outside of these boards, of course).
None of my friends or family know we are TTC, but everyone is always assuming we will be “soon” since we were recently married. I know people are genuinely excited for us to start a family and their questions/comments (hopefully) are innocent, but it just really sucks that it seems like everyone is constantly asking “if we have kids yet” “when are you having kids” “are you pregnant yet!?” “you need to have kids now bc i like babies/want grandchildren” etc. The entire extended family has already been on “bump-watch” with me for over a year already, constantly watching me at family events to see if I’m drinking, and they’re always thinking that I’m pregnant for truly random reasons. My heart really goes out to other bees who have experienced this for much longer than we have, because it does wear on you after a while and I don’t even know how to respond anymore, without straight up telling everyone our business.
Sorry this turned into a really long vent, (thank you for reading this far) but it already feels better to type this all out. The only person I can talk to about this is Darling Husband, and he always says that there is probably nothing wrong and that I’m fine, but that just doesn’t make me feel better.
I’d love to hear from other bees about their experiences with Provera, Provera & Clomid together, how your PCOS diagnosis was made, or any smart comebacks to deal with people who constantly remind you how you’re not PG yet!