(Closed) i need advice on my guess list….

posted 8 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
4485 posts
Honey bee

Invite whom YOU want, not whom anyone else wants. Who are you close to? Make a list of those people you want to be there and can’t imagine the day without. Don’t invite anyone you don’t want there, especially if it’s only out of obligation that you considered them.

Most people know not to ask why they aren’t invited if they don’t receive an invitation. If someone does have the guts to ask, you can say you want a small wedding. No further explanation necessary.

I really don’t understand your mention of people using your guestlist against you. Are people really that juvenile, selfish and petty? If that is remotely a concern, don’t invite them since they don’t care about you at all. Don’t let them bully you. End of story. As an adult, you’re going to have to learn how to stand up for yourself and if they can’t respect you and your wishes, then you don’t need them in your life.

Post # 4
Member
1601 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

i understand where you’re coming from. my family alone is bigger than his family and friends 😛

i say start with immediate family, and then work out who you need to have, who you’d like to have and who you could live without.

if someone isn’t invited and gets upset even though you talk to them, don’t let it bother you because they’re not worth ruining your big day.

Post # 5
Member
273 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2011

we had the same issue except it was his family that was twice as large as mine.  we ended up not doing a 50/50 split on the guest list.  it bothers my mom some but there really wasn’t much i could do about it.  it doesn’t really bother me that much because they’re going to be my family soon enough.

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