- 6 years ago
- Wedding: May 2013
Oh goodness, where do I even begin. I guess with the good! 🙂
My fiancé and I have been together for 2 and a half years now! We have a bunch of cows that are like our children and the cutest Chihuahua! We are getting married in May, building a beautiful house on 6 acres, and pretty much just loving life.
Where the bad came in… In the beginning of our relationship I always suspected my fiancé wasn’t very faithful. I once caught his ex’s name across his screen on his phone, but he played it off well and I believed him. I asked him multiple times if he was talking to her which he always denied. I played it off as it was my own insecurities. A year into our relationship, we are already living together at this point, I found out that all of this time he was talking to his ex as well as three other girls. As you can imagine, I was devastated. After a separation, long talks, access to all of his phone records, accounts..etc. I finally was able to overlook the situation and we continued on with our relationship. We actually felt stronger. I had to tell you all of this so you could understand what’s going on now.
His mother and his father divorced many many years ago and are both remarried. They despise each other. I mean to the point where if one comes to our wedding the other wouldn’t be caught dead there.
My fiancé works 7-12’s this caused us to miss Easter and mother’s day. (Both were planned an hour from where we live the exact time my fiancé got off work). It was literally IMPOSSIBLE for us to get there. His mom and sister blew up on us for not being able to make it to either function. Naturally I went to my mom’s alone, because my fiance was working. (Was I wrong for not going to their house alone?)
This is just the beginning. Ever since missing those days his mom and sister have used every excuse to lash out against me. I put a picture on Facebook of my fiancé holding a beer. (We are both 25 years old). We hardly drink. We were at a river fest country concert and decided to have a beer. His sister grabs the photo offline and shows his mom. (his sister is under age and drinks might I add). His mom calls me and tells me that I am not taking care of her son by allowing him to drink. We had ONE beer and we were staying at my parents that are within walking distance to the river. His mom and I talk for hours after she calls me 37 times while I was at work….then we end up getting into a knockdown drag out over text message.. I was trying so hard to be respectful and apologize.. for my fiancés sake.. But when she told me I was demon possessed I lost it..I said somethings that I were feeling that I probably should not have, but nothing that wasnt true.
I like to believe I am a good girl. I am a college graduate and an engineer at a refinery. I attend church almost every Sunday. I always treat people with respect and I am always looking out for others. I cook for my fiancé every night. I wake him up make his breakfast and lunch. I keep our house extremely clean. I do everything for him. I just don’t understand how she could hate me over something so small.
After doing a little more investigating.. I realized this might not at all have been about the picture of the beer. It was probably about the picture posted the day before of my fiancé’s 5 year old sister I was babysitting. A product of his father and his new wife.. His mother cannot handle it even though she has been remarried for 14 years!!
They decided to attack me. They invite the EX from the beginning of the story to stay at their house for the weekend. This caused a HUGE fight between my fiancé and me. How could they be so betraying after they know the pain it initially caused me? They have since had my electricity cut off. They prank call me. They signed me up for a Lap Band consultation (I am a size 2!!!!!!!) When we got engaged all his mom said in a text was “have you told your sister” When we told his sister she text “swell”.. We haven’t heard anything about it since.
We have not spoken to them in almost a year. His mom will text my fiancé every now and then for brief questions, but he hardly texts back. His mother has never really been a mother to him so he is very used to this. His dad raised him most of his life.
My fiancé talks to his father every day. We see them every now and then and I watch his little sister when I can! As I told you in the beginning his father, stepmom, and baby sister will not attend the wedding if his mother comes.
I respectfully sent her a save-the-date. This is what my fiancé wanted me to do. I know she will come to the wedding just to cause a scene. Maybe show up in all black. I am so worried that my fiancé is going to be disappointed when his dad doesn’t come. All because of his mother that has caused us so much harm that he doesn’t speak to.
Last night I was addressing my bridal shower invitations. I asked him if I needed to invite his mother. I do not want to because she despises me. The shower is for me and I do not want to be there with her without my fiancé. Once again we haven’t spoken to her in a year, but she would show up just to cause a scene. This once again caused a HUGE fight.
I am so sorry this is so long. I am just so confused. Am I wrong? What should I do?