Feeling unhappy…

posted 2 years ago in Relationships
Post # 2
Member
9681 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2016

     

Post # 3
Member
11650 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2015

You clearly want to be with your ex. Why are you engaged to someone else?

Post # 4
Member
2579 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2017

Sounds like you’re still hung up on the ex and wishing you were with him. That’s not fair to your current fiancé at all. 

Post # 5
Member
304 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2017

There’s a big difference between having different interests and hobbies, and being incompatible. My current Fiance and I have many different interests and hobbies, which we do separately, but we have a lot of fun together in general and are very compatible personality-wise. We support one another in our separate interests (I will sometimes watch car shows with him, he will come cheer me on when I run a race) and are happy doing so.

On the other hand, it sounds as if you and your Fiance may just not be that compatible. It seems like your separate interests are causing resentment, he isn’t compromising and supporting you as much as you’d like him to, and your personalities are very different. Plus, you could be hung up still on your ex. If you’re not happy in your current relationship, why are you staying?

If you do want to stay with your current SO, seeking counseling could be beneficial before getting married to sort through some of this stuff.

Post # 6
Member
2128 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: March 2017

You haven’t been with your Fiance for very long. It sounds like you are rushing into marriage. It’s not fair for your Fiance for you to keep comparing him to your ex. 

Post # 7
Member
1150 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2017

Didn’t you already post this?  How old are you because you both sound pretty immature and I don’t think you’re ready to get married.  When I was like 21/22 going out to bars and clubs was my #1 activity but now that I’m in my mid-late 20’s I would much rather stay home and cuddle with my FI/dog watching a movie or hang out with my girlfriends in my PJ’s or something.  If I was with someone now who still wanted to go out to clubs every weekend we wouldn’t be compatible anymore.

 

If you’re still young you will both grow and change a lot throughout your 20’s and while getting married young can work out you really need to make sure you grow together rather than grow apart.  It sounds like you two are growing apart already.  Sorry. 

Post # 8
Member
320 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2018

Are you sure you aren’t just seeing the good in your ex now that the two of you aren’t together anymore? Do you think if you dumped your fiancé and got back with your ex that your ex would want to go out with you dancing, etc all the time? Would he make you happier than your fiancé does now? I’d think carefully about this. It might just be a case of wanting something you can’t have.

Post # 9
Member
2493 posts
Buzzing bee

It sounds like you guys are just funamentally incompatible. I wouldn’t get married in this situation.

Post # 10
Member
6663 posts
Bee Keeper

It doesn’t sound as if spending the rest of your life with your Boyfriend or Best Friend is very appealing to you–so don’t agree to marry him. Your ex is probably your ex for a reason. Perhaps take a break from relationships and figure out what is important to you. 

Post # 11
Member
366 posts
Helper bee

I’m pretty sure you already posted this under a different title and got a whole bunch of responses.

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