- 4 years ago
Ok, so I know the title sounds odd and you guys can’t exactly pick my bridesmaids for me, but I need a little advice.
This is probably going to get pretty long so I apologise in advance.
I no longer speak to anyone from my highscool or uni days, except for one girl (A). Through A over the past few years I have met and become quite good friends two more girls (B and C). The four of us form a pretty tight knit group but A still sees herself as the center. I know that I want these three girls as my bridesmaids. The problem is that just the other day I was talking with A about C (who has a lot of tough things going on for her at the moment) and A said “I know you want a really small wedding but I hope there’s room for C to come because I think she really needs the break”. Um, what? I was planning on having her as a bridesmaid.
Now I realise that A has no idea how close the rest of us are, and definitely sees herself as being the center of the group. It’s like she doesn’t realise that we all get along just as well with each other as we do with her and that she is no longer the centrepiece holding the group together so to speak. So I don’t want to make it awkward for her when I ask them all to be bridesmaids. And that is problem number 1.
Alongside these three girls I will also have my FI’s best friend’s wife. Over the past year we have gotten very close and I feel like we are only going to get closer. The guys have a very strong friendship and we all plan on having children together so I would love to include her in our wedding.
Problem number two is about my sister. She is 7 years younger than I am, which is not a problem except that she is 16 (just 18 by the time of the wedding). While I love her to pieces I feel as though right now we do not have a strong friendship because we are at such different stages in our lives. I would love to include her in the wedding by having her do a reading and sign the marriage certificate but don’t want her as a bridesmaid. However my mother has stated that she would be very upset if I didn’t have my sister as a bridesmaid and that most people (possibly including my sister) would be expecting it.
I do not have a problem with having 5 bridesmaids (and therefore an uneven wedding party as Fiance has 4 attendants) but I don’t know if I should have my sister as a bridesmaid just because that’s what everyone will expect.
Finally, is it weird to just not have a MOH? I know that A would be expecting it and while she is my longest friend, I don’t think I am any closer to her than I am to B and C. Also, I don’t like the feeling that picking a Maid/Matron of Honor is like ranking my friends.
So what do all you lovely bees think? How do I go about telling A that B and C will be bridesmaids too? Do I pick my sister just to keep the peace? Can I just have no MOH?
Thanks in advance and sorry for any typos, I’m on my phone because my laptop broke 🙁