(Closed) I need help writing a poem/rhyme for our Alice in Wonderland invites! Please!!!!

posted 8 years ago in Paper
Post # 3
46611 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999


Morning Mister Chatterbox

I’d love to stop and chatter

But in ______short  months

I must meet with the Mad HatterI

Sunday the _____of ____ is the date

For the  marriage of _____and _______

What a cause to celebrate!

The festivities begin at two o’clock

At _______________________

Don’t be late for this very important date!




Post # 4
870 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2011

Here’s the first thing to come to mind, sorry if it sounds bad:


A date, a date, please do not be late!

The wedding of _____ and _____ is near

Two people that we hold so dear.

Sunday (date) is coming fast

At 2 O’Clock, not a minute past!

Oh me, oh my! How time does fly!

The wedding’s at (venue), please do stop by

The marriage will not wait!


The first and last line rhyme even though they aren’t by each other.

Post # 5
566 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

Here’s what I came up with:


Oh my I’m thrilled

I can not wait

The date is set to celebrate

And who my dear should we all cheer?

Why ____ & ____ it’s all quite clear

On the 10th of April 2011 @ (venue) 

The place is heaven

Festivities begin at 2

we want to share this day with you


Post # 6
566 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

oh I’m having an alice themed wedding too so let me know what you end up doing for the invites.

Post # 8
1330 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

here’s one i found on google that i editted a little to fit yours…

The mad hatter and the queen of heart.

Would like to invite you to take part,

in the marriage between __________& __________

(date here) , when the clock strikes 2,

at the (venue), no sooner or later or falling through.

We will all gather afterwards to celebrate

check with the white rabbit & don’t be late!

We hope you r.s.v.p. that you can attend,

to share in a beginning that will never end!


Post # 9
6256 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: March 2014

I can’t come up with anything, but would like to say this is a really great idea and I’m sure your guests will appreciate your originality no matter which you pick!

It might help if you try to keep the candence (? not sure if thats the right word) the same or similar on each line. 

like instead of saying 

“quarter pound of beef, lettuce, sesame-seed bun and cheddar cheese

It’s always bound to please”

it’d be like

“beef, lettuce, cheddar cheese

Grab the snack that’s bound to please”

(Sorry for the weird burger analogy, I just reworked some copy for a client…)

By and large, when people read poetry, if they know it rhymes they will try and fit it all into the structure of the first line or two (like twinkle, twinkle little star or something like that) so if your first line has 15 syllables and your second line has 3, or if your first two have 5 and your next two have 11, it will throw people off and lose a little bit of its poemy goodness. I liked the one you wrote–but it sounds like you didn’t, and this might be why.

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