(Closed) I never wanted to be one of those women who complains about the size…..

posted 9 years ago in Rings
Post # 47
Member
1731 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

@MrsCreeToBe:  Well you got exactly what you wanted so this should be a time to celebrate. 

Your Fi listened to you and you guys have a great relationship and are getting married.  Your friend is petty and gets her jollies by making others feel bad that’s not much of a friend. 

Why did you pine over the your friend’s ring, is it just because when she whipped it out no one said anything bad about it?  I love my ring but sometimes I see 2 carat diamonds and I think damn!! That’s a big ring.  Part of me thinks I’ve love to be able to own a diamond that big but I can’t. (Altough I’d wear it in a pendant!)

I love my ring and picked it out its over a carat and I still get jealous sometimes that people have enough money to afford a 2ct diamond.  I think man what I would do with that kind of money. 

But there’s another flip side to that.  Just because they have that ring doesn’t mean they can actually afford it.  Just because they have that ring it doesn’t mean that their Fiance loves them more.  It doesn’t mean that ring is actually a diamond or isn’t very included.  And even if they can afford it, it is a nice diamond, and their Fiance does love them does it really matter??

Identify why you feel jealous and insecure and I bet it has nothing to do with the size of your diamond and more probably to do with the way your friend treated you.  Get a blingy band because you want to not because it will get them off your back (because honestly a blingy band will probably not stop the harsh comments).  Even if you get a plain band, march into that room with your “friend” as if you have a 3ct rock on your hand and own it.  You are happy and she was being petty and it looks like it may have worked because now you are doubting yourself. 

And if for some reason you decide you want a bigger diamond down the road because you want it and not because it will help you fit in then go ahead and get one.  Fitting in is over-rated.  And if you lived in another part of the country where the diamond size is smaller you probably would fit in just fine and they would look odd and be ridiculed. 

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@Mrs_Amanda:  + 1

Post # 48
Member
189 posts
Blushing bee

@Floridian Belle:  + 1 ….and smaller stones usually have better quality in color, inclusions and cut. 

Post # 49
Member
532 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

@MrsCreeToBe:  I have a ring that I think is somewhere between .5 and .75 and I have definitely gotten comments about its size. It does have channel set diamonds on the side. I think there is some expectation in certain areas of the country that everyone needs to have 1 carat or bigger. I used to work with a woman who has a three stone ring where all three are one carat diamonds, and most other women have at least 1.5-3 carats. Oh NYC. 

The odd part for me is that everyone knows that my Fiance is a really poor student, so they are always like “how did he afford to buy you a ring at all?” It was my grandmother’s, so it was free, but its kind of hilarious how you can’t win no matter what. 

Enjoy your ring, but if you want a diamond band you should go for it! I tried on plain gold and diamonds and there is something super seductive about all that shininess. 

Post # 50
Member
6257 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2013

Similar situation here and I haven’t even gotten the e-ring yet! Heirloom stone (and awesome quality) but altogether it’s mid sized at best, especially for my line of work (.67 round diamond, 2 mm plain band). I LOVE IT but Fiance pointed out, as soon as we had it our hot little hands (it was getting set): “Be prepared for people in a corporate work atmosphere like yours to not be impressed.” BOO. That comment kind of rained on my parade for a second … :-/ I know it only matters what i think and I am super excited to get and wear this thing (and for what it symbolizes) but the reality is I am a bit of an overly sensitive person and other people can be asshats …

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