(Closed) I picked my e-ring, should i feel bad?

posted 7 years ago in Rings
Post # 3
6892 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: March 2012

Never had this “problem” per se, but my fiance and I did the SAME thing. I didn’t know what I wanted before we went, but we did go together and pick out rings we thought I would like. I tried them on, he knew immediately which I liked the best, but we kept looking. I had a “top three.” He picked number one and went back and got it later, then proposed.

It’s not weird at all and is much more common than you think. Being on here made me realize that. It’s not odd, you shouldn’t feel bad. Just because maybe THEY wouldn’t do it doesn’t mean it’s not done or even normal.

Post # 4
1776 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: February 2011

I don’t think it’s weird at al!  We picked out my setting together…he wanted my input.  The diamond was all his call, though.  I did say I like round and cushion best, though.

Post # 5
853 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

Many people choose or have a say in their ring these days. Nothing wrong with that! Sounds like a great choice, and congrats!!

Post # 6
288 posts
Helper bee

No, this is common and if your SO is okay with it and you know you’ll love it forever, then there’s no reason to feel bad about it! My SO and I went ring shopping together, and I was supposed to have a “top 3” as well. Once I put my soon to be ring on my finger, he and I both knew it was the ring. No questions. This situation just happens to be what suits you guys. I agree with Ameliabedelia completely! =)

Post # 7
6512 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: September 2012

I didn’t pick my ring myself, but I did drop some hints 🙂  I also know a lot of people, both on here and in real life, that picked their own rings and it is totally fine.  I think it is all about what works for the couple, and just because it is not what your sister/cousin want, doesn’t mean that isn’t whats best for you.  Don’t worry about it dear!

Post # 8
11384 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2010

No do not feel bad. People will say what they please but its the norm these days really. Plus when my husband is putting money into something & its something I will wear everyday for the rest of my life I want to make for dag on sure I LOVE it. I mean I honestly like every ring I see just about it. I like 100’s of different styled rings & hope to have lots of right hand rings to trade out with. But for the engagement ring I am going to be wearing everyday I wanted a solitaire. ALWAYS have wanted a solitaire. So I picked my engagement ring both times (lost the other one.) And my husband was glad I helped him out. He knows my style. He could go pick one ring from 1000 & I know I would LOVE it. But we do everything else together, so it was very us to do this together as well!


Post # 9
187 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: December 2012

I totally picked my ring! The only “choice” my Fiance had was between 2 settings and the actually shade of blue for the diamond.  He knew I wanted the darkest blue he could find, and that I wanted a halo of white diamonds, there were only 2 settings we looked at, and I definitely steered him towards the one I wanted more.  It’s YOUR ring, I think it’s great that some people are totally surprised and have no say, but it’s a very expensive purchase that you wear every day, why not have a say in it?

Post # 10
7606 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

We had mine designed and made for me and we were both there every step of the way.  I couldn’t have imagined it any other way!

Post # 11
116 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

I don’t think it’s a bad thing, me and FH did the same thing! An e-ring is an investment plus the biggest thing he’s ever bought in life, so why buy something you won’t love? Can’t wait for you to get your ring!

Post # 12
111 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: December 2012

Don’t feel bad!  Especially if you and your (future) fiance were on the same page.  Some people want a big surprise, and others want things to be more “lets do this together.”  It sounds like you guys had a great bonding experience of it, and a beautiful ring is coming your way!  Be proud and happy and don’t worry about the rest.

Post # 13
7295 posts
Busy Beekeeper

i did exactly what you did and i don’t feel bad at all about it.  i love my ring!

Post # 14
1501 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

I don’t see this as a problem. It is great because you’ll be wearing a ring you love and he will know you truly love it.

Before we were engaged I was making dinner one night and he was on the computer. He called me over to look at something and he had a bunch of ring pictures up as he wanted to get an idea of what I liked. One that he had up I loved and told him I wanted that one no doubt. So he arranged to go buy it and the next day after work we went. It is a ‘used’ ring but when I saw it I just knew it needed to be on my finger!

Post # 15
424 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

My husband PREFERRED that I just tell him what I wanted so that I ended up with something I would love forever.  I think many men would probably prefer to have help from their lady rather than being in the dark about the whole process.

Post # 16
246 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2013


that is exactly what we did!  he told me that i should find out what kind of ring i liked. so i went shopping. 

originally i wanted a 1 ct round with lots of bling on the band. but when i tried them on, it wasn’t me. i fell in love with a .75 solitare. i am glad that i was able to do the planning and picking. he is not one who likes to shop, so it was perfect for him. infact we selected the diamond together. he told me his price range, and we examined the diff diamonds together. 

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