- 5 years ago
- Wedding: June 2014 - Italiano's Humble
We’ve had a date picked for a month. So we’ve been engaged, but no rings were exchanged.
So, Thursday, I go and pick out a simple Stainless ring for FH, with black Celtic crosses. I light the candles, a little Rated R activity, etc…He said yes, LOL!
Well, earlier Thursday, I send a pic to my MOH/BFF. I get on here, Bees give me awesome ideas, but I’m a kid in a candy store when it comes to any kind of gift lol. She tells me, to wait til the bonfire we’re all having NYE. That way, I propose on the day we’re getting married, a year later. Nice, but she’s the type to be like “Yeah, that was my idea”. So, I zilched it all, and then I did it my way lol.
Well, I make her swear not to tell him. Well, she knew he was going to do it ring-pop style, on Christmas Day. I wasn’t aware of this. I figured it’d be my birthday, or something next month. She calls early Thursday evening, but under the guise of asking him what I’d want, and to call her back when he’s alone, etc.
Tonight, he lets me know, he’s doing his damnedest, not to dislike her. Apparently, Friday when we went over there, she told him “I knew she was going to do it, and I was calling to tell you, so you knew it was coming”. UMM, WTF heffer??? It doesn’t matter (to me), if he had a proposal, I wanted to do the untraditional thing, since that’s what we’ve been doing since we got together!
Then, I told her I really wanted to go look at dresses alone and when she asked why, I said, “I don’t want anyone to go with me”. I plan to buy my dress through DressilyMe.com. They have 2 Alfred Angelo dresses, 2 from David’s, and 1 from Maggie. All are on my favorites on their site. So, I booked appointments at all 3 places, to try the gowns on. She damn near flipped shit, and would NOT leave me alone, til I finally said I wanted MY OWN opinion, not multiple. She’s all butt hurt now, I guess. In both of our last relationships, she did her best to upstage me. She succeeded, quite a bit, as well. Also, we aren’t disclosing our budget to family and friends. I don’t want her to know, that even though I intend to do online for my gown, I have a $650 budget if I find a different dress in person. I don’t want someone sitting there going “why spend it, when you can get this cheaper(in store) dress and do X with that extra money”.
I don’t want to go Bridezilla, but strangely enough, I feel like I might. She never wants to come to our home. We’re almost positive that despite promises made, with regards to our kids, she’ll figure out a way to NOT come to the Christmas thing we’re having, which is just our family and hers. I’m just not in the mood, to have to do everything around her. I already told FH I’d push our date back(even though we have all these things planned already), if she somehow pulls off getting engaged before our wedding.
**Before anyone thinks I’m being snotty. We got pregnant almost 3 months apart. She was allegedly on BC, and it was actually to the point where our XH’s(they were BFF’s til she drove them apart), actually thought the baby wasn’t her husbands! My ex and I announced our date, and she decided she just HAD to call her then-FH at his military school, and TELL him, they were getting married ASAP. When XH and I went house hunting, she made her XH start looking at hosues also. We backed out of a house deal, she jumped on an over priced home(even the inspector was like “uhhh, sure”). They lost their house, b/c she went on hardship payments to cover the wedding.
I don’t want to go through this again. FH is the type that, if we’re putting our hearts and money into this, WE get a say so. We aren’t close with our moms, we’re ok with our dads, so everything is essentially us. He really feels that if push comes to shove, he will ask her to step down himself. She’s the type to think that her opinion is most important, as she almost said when disucssing my bridal appointments, about why wouldn’t I want her opinion.