Post # 1
So, I’ve been with my finace for sometime now, and have never liked his best friend. All throughout high school he was a jerk to me, and a lot of other people. He even tried convincing my finace (then bf) to break up with me at an early point in our relationship. My finace and I have had a few fights because of the guy, and I told him that I really didn’t feel comfortable with him being in our wedding. But I feel bad being that person. I told him I may be able to get to a point where I was ok with it. And then he went and asked him (he tought I was ok, but I wasn’t). Now, I don’t know what to do. I really don’t want someone who has been an issue in our relationship to be a part of our day. It feels wrong to me. He said he would be ok with no best man or maid of honor, but I don’t wanna give up my maid of honor She’s his sister, and we are both close to her, and she’s excited about it. She’s been so supportive and helpful throughtout our whole relationship, and so it’s like the complete opposite of his best friend. What should I do?
Post # 3
Grin and bear it, focusing on your dislike if the best man only reinforces his reasons for complaining about you, detracts from your attention on your FI and creates unnecessary tension between your FI and his friend. If it were me I would do my best to be cordial and polite, inviting and gracious and draw the line at any disrespect or rudeness on the part of the best man. If he’s as awful as you say, he’ll hang himself far better than you can, and if not, then there’s nothing to worry about.
Post # 4
If you can stomach him standing up there at the altar with your FI, then I say just let it go. You won’t have to interact with him much for the day/night, and regardless of if he’s BM or not, he’ll probably still be at the wedding.
Take a deep breath and focus on the fact that you get to have your great MOH 🙂
Post # 5
Either give up your maid of honour if you insist on him dropping his best man, or grin and bear it. Obviously your FI is very close with this guy and wants him to stand up with him on the biggest day of his life. Yes you may not like him, but your FI does.
Post # 6
@Nona99: Agreed. It sounds like this guy isn’t going anywhere, so try to be as nice as possible to him.