I really like this guy, but….?

posted 3 years ago in Relationships
Post # 46
Member
2699 posts
Sugar bee

mindzoo :  Sugar Bean, online dating is NOT FOR YOU. It IS a game. It’s a game that sometimes CAN turn into the real deal but it’s mostly a game. Just like you set up a profile and get 100 replies, he also has gotten 100 replies. He is talking to many, many women and although you may have felt a CONNECTION there initially (and probably stopped looking at profiles), they generally won’t for a bit. It does not mean he didn’t like you or that anything is wrong with you. Don’t take that to heart or internalize it so deeply. KNOW WHO YOU ARE!! Sometimes it is as simple as – he found someone who screwed him on the meet & greet (she may not last but he will venture off for a month or two and dip into that well until he has tired of it). THEN when he has tired of it, Casper the Ghost rings your bell again! That is a man who isn’t worth your time and efforts. Let him play those games with the women that enjoy playing them. It apparently isn’t for you. You’re not crazy. You’re a perfectly SANE woman who has let men DRIVE her crazy. Take a deep breath, delete those profiles, step away from the pc and rejoin the human race outside your home. There are men to be found in every nook and cranny of the universe. Go get yourself one. Technology is not your friend.

Post # 48
Member
8327 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

mindzoo : 

Nevertheless what leilarobs says is true, online dating is the worst for you , In fact, looking at your other threads   I think you should stop ALL dating for while  and get yourself  bit more sorted out before starting up again.

Also, I know you are very anxious,  but you are also rather dismissive of anyone else’s anxiety  and very ready to label their behaviours mean  crazy ,jerking you around, lame ass  etc etc . And you don’t seem to fully comprehend  that if someone finds you  not to their taste after a  few dates/conversations , that doesn’t make them -or you – a bad person.  

Post # 49
Member
266 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: February 2017

I don’t think there is a single mixed message in his responses

 

He changed his mind, he doesn’t want to date you, why is his business. 

He blocked you because he’s worried about stalker tendencies, text bombing, verifying information and obsessing over someone you dated very briefly would make me worry about stalker tendencies. 

You are not acting in a stable way. Not even a little bit. If you’re feelings are hurt then attend to that, therapy, time, ice cream, whatever but your feelings are no longer his concern, he doesn’t want to date you and that’s his right. 

Will he come crawling back? I doubt it, you’ve acted very oddly, I imagine your behaviour has worried him further and solidified his choice to be honest. 

I think you need to seek some psychiatric help, your inability to react in a proportionate fashion may indicate a condition such as borderline personality disorder or more severe anxiety than you are aware of. Please seek help. You can be happy whether single or in a relationship but I think you likely need some TLC to get yourself there. Good luck.  

Post # 50
Member
34 posts
Newbee

The “phone doesn’t work” and blocking you from Facebook are HUGE red flags. I had a guy do that to me and turns out he was living with his “ex.” RUN.

Post # 51
Member
5048 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: September 2017

What!? This is totally fishy and I would back away 100%.  He 1)blocked you and 2) blamed it on a fear of being stalked?  Move on to the next guy.  Too many issues too soon.

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