(Closed) I really need some encouraging words. Long

posted 6 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
334 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

Oh wow. I’m sorry you’ve been dealing with all of this. It obviously couldn’t have been easy. It is SUCH a good thing you’re no longer with him. I read your previous post and paired with this, he’s obviously an extremely toxic person. You can do so much better without him. I’m utterly shocked at the way he treated you. Cut all contact with him and move on. You don’t don’t need someone like that in your life.

Post # 4
286 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

My rule is always: Stay AWAY from men with “baby mamas”.  You are definately better off without him and hopefully the next guy you find will be a far better person!

Post # 5
9916 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2013

He sounds like an asshole.  It sucks for his kids, too, because he was so wrong to bring his daughter to your house when she was sick.  That’s so mean.  He’s an asshole for calling you a bitch.  


You are well shot of him.  Take a weekend to go out with your friends, and then start going on dates.  Or take up a new hobby.


Post # 6
3569 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

This was hard to read you need to put spaces and paragraphs in.

I say run as fast as you can, taking all the issues with the kids and living situation out.

Your boyfriend sounds like an absuvie and childish person. I hope this women takes him to court for her childs sake, but it sounds like she was making empty threats.


Post # 8
872 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

This post has so many red flags, personally I would have cut this relationship off. 

If you two are to get through this then there is going to be some serious counseling, I don’t mean just for you two, but also family counseling for his daughter and the two of you. There should be parental classes the both of you take, but right now as it is – it’s so dysfunctional. 

This man needs to grow up, and he is setting a horrible example for his children, and he clearly doesn’t know how to be a good, stable, reliable father and transfer that over to his women. He should go to counseling with his baby mama, and repair his relationship with her. He is raising his children in a volatile relationship where they only see destruction and uncomfortable people, unhappy love. 

The only way I see this truly working out is giving a lot, so much of yourself that you risk losing who you are, by twisting this guy’s arm to go to counseling with you, with you and his child, with you, his baby mama and all of those things. There needs to be a lot of work done here, a lot. The question is are you willing to go that far? Kids make this complicated, and they should always, always, always be put first which is clearly not happening here. 

In the end though I would say leave him because this man needs help, he needs to grow, he needs to work things out with his baby mama and his children, he needs to focus on these things right now so he can become a good father, a stable human being.


Post # 9
2959 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

It is difficult for me to comprehend why ANY woman would put up with such behavior. Lose him. It’s NOT going to get any better!

Post # 10
2053 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I’m sorry to hear this all happened. Be thankful you are through with him and his circus. You will heal in time and be so much healthier and happier. Hang in there.

Post # 11
423 posts
Helper bee

Wow, I’m not a mother but I can understand that it must have been awful for you and the child to be in that position. At least you had the good sense to report the incident to the child’s mother. Imagine if his girlfriend wasn’t so sympathetic or understanding? You did the right thing here. That being said, this man sounds like a pathetic a**hole. He has treated you with disrespect and I don’t think he has any respect for his children either. He is incapable of sustaining a loving, nurturing relationship. Maybe it is a disorder or a disease. You never know. Long story short, don’t be hurt by his behavior. Think of him as a sick person, offer him your sympathy and then move on in life. You can’t do anything to help him and whatever happened wasn’t your fault.

Post # 12
3692 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: December 2011

He deserves to have his daughter taken away.  The way he treats her (and you), he’s clrearly got a screw loose. 

Post # 13
9671 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2013

This guy is a jerk and TOXIC.  You should be happy you got out before you married into that!!

You have it right, don’t ever speak to him again!!

Post # 14
739 posts
Busy bee

If it were me I would have been out the door a long time ago. To much drama. If my Fiance or Hubby EVER said those things to me or called me those names I would be gone in a second. You need to respect yourself a little more. This guy obviously does not have any respect for you or women in general. I feel bad for his kids and the women who are stuck dealing with him the rest of their kids lives.

Post # 15
1469 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

@PizzutiStudios:  +1! Especially about respecting yourself more and feeling sorry for that poor kid.

The topic ‘I really need some encouraging words. Long’ is closed to new replies.

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