(Closed) I said she could not bring a date.. Was that wrong?

posted 5 years ago in Family
Post # 3
1293 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

no, i truly do not think that you did the wrong thing. These situations are unbelievable awkward and honestly a part of the planning process that I am dreading.

I think that you were kind enough to let the daughter come even though she was clearly not invited. Honestly I would not worry about it, you did nothing wrong!

Post # 4
2946 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

No, you shouldn’t have said yes.  There is no problem saying no in this case.  We have a lot of “obligated to invite” friends of the family.  Even though I know some of their kids from growing up, none of their kids are invited. 

They were wrong for not paying attention to the invites as to who was invited.

Post # 5
3076 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2013 - A court...

Nope. They weren’t invited & your still letting them go, so I thought that was fair.

Post # 6
2532 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

No you should have just said “I’m sorry, we are not able to accomodae daughter #1 and daughter #2 at our wedding. I will mark you and your husband as attending.”

Post # 7
1475 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

@CarterLove:  You were more than nice – I would have told the woman that sorry, the invitation was only for her and her husband. You should absolutely not feel guily about telling the daughter that she can’t bring a date!

Post # 8
181 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

@CarterLove:  that was extremely rude of step mom’s sister. You addressed their invitation to her and her husband and now she’s saying she is bringing plus THREE? You were nice enough to even let the daughters come after they weren’t invited. Don’t feel bad, she is the rude one. You have a max guest list and weddings arent cheap. That frustrates me. I am acouple months away from invites, I worry about these types of situations. You should not have said yes. 

Post # 9
4192 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: July 2012 - Baltimore Museum of Industry

No, the girls weren’t invited to begin with. Allowing two univited guests is generous enough, let alone some randon teenage boy.

Post # 10
4698 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

@CarterLove:  No you shouldn’t have said yes. Nor should you allow anyone else to make you feel bad about decisions you make regarding your wedding. Its perfectly reasonable to not allow someone you barely know to bring a date you know even less.

If anything, she should feel bad for inviting uninvited guests to someone elses wedding. Terribly rude.

Post # 11
16195 posts
Honey Beekeeper

I agree that it’s nice of you to allow the daughters to attend. I understand that you’re frustrated even by that! I also don’t think they need to bring dates. You have to draw the line somewhere, and as they’ll be attending with family, it’s not like they won’t know anyone at the wedding.

Post # 12
541 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

No, but you shouldn’t have allowed the daughter to attend either. I love how this woman thinks nothing of inviting 2 extra guests to your wedding, but then thinks she’s being polite by confirming whether they can bring dates. SMH.

Post # 13
1311 posts
Bumble bee

No, you didn’t do anything wrong.  And personally, I wouldn’t have let the daughters come at all.  A budget is a budget!  How presumptuous could people be to invite themselves?

Post # 16
215 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2005

@CarterLove:  You did absolutely nothing wrong! Infact it was super rude of this women to text you at all. It was nice of you to allow her to bring her daughters (even though you totally did not have to). 

It’s over now and don’t let it bother you! This women was rude and honestly if she is so offended and decides not to come it probobly won’t be a big loss. 

Also, we are getting married on the same day!! It’s getting sooooo close!! 

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