(Closed) I said "Umm Maybe?" to the dress

posted 3 years ago in Dress
Post # 16
Member
157 posts
Blushing bee

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blackparadebride :  I am very similar to you in how I react to things and had a very similar experience with dress shopping.  I went to a few stores on my own, then narrowed it down to two dresses at an appt that my parents came to.  I went back a week later by myself to try both of them on again and chose my dress.  People working in the store and other customers all kept making pity comments to me “are you here alone getting your dress?!” and then the sales associate got upset bc I took my dress off in the fitting room because she wanted me to be wearing the dress to hold a sign, ring a bell and have my photo taken bc it’s some store tradition.  I was like “could we just…not do that part?!”  I ended up just ringing the bell at the register to humor everyone.  Haha it was such an awkward experience because so many people were upset for me not crying and saying yes to the dress.   I liked my dress, my fitting appts were much more laid back and even up until my wedding I would question myself bc I wasn’t feeling anything overwhelming about my dress.  On my wedding day though, when I put it on, I knew it was perfect for me, and my husband’s emotional reaction to seeing me was what ended up making me finally feel like yep, this was worth it. 

Try it on later when you are made up a little more, and maybe even try a few others just to mix it up, but chances are, if you like it and keep feeling like it’s a good one, it will be the one you want.  Good luck!

Post # 17
Member
155 posts
Blushing bee

I thought I’d know the dress was “the one” from an emotional perspective, but I really was more practical about my decision and I wondered the whole time up till the wedding. I never had that “omg this is THE ONE!” feeling. In some ways I am a little disappointed at that. I think it was even harder for me to gauge if it was the right one because my mom will cry at the drop of a hat and I thought she would be emotional and she wasn’t, but it was the right dress for me regardless.

Post # 18
Member
2763 posts
Sugar bee

I didn’t have a big emotional reaction. But I’m also not someone who ever envisioned my wedding dress particularly or had a strong vision of how my wedding should be. I just decided on a dress, (as well as venue, catering, etc.) that was within my budget and that I felt satisfied with generally. I probably could have found something I loved more had I looked longer and harder or raised my budget, but it honestly wasn’t a huge priority to me. I felt good in my dress, the cost was reasonable, and my friends and family loved it, so I figured it was good enough and moved on. I do think our society has overhyped finding “The Dress” to an insane extent.

Post # 19
Member
3855 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: December 2016

I bought the 6th dress I tried on. It fit perfectly, it looked good, it was in my budget. Boom, done. I wasn’t looking for an epiphany in the form of a dress… 

Post # 20
Member
839 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2019 - Country/barn

You’re not alone! I did not get emotional either. I don’t get the whole crying because you found your wedding dress? 

Post # 21
Member
1405 posts
Bumble bee

Over my dead body would I cry about trying on a wedding dress. I’m just not a crier. I got my dress because I liked it a lot and it was within my budget. No dress regret 8 months later so I think my method worked. 

Post # 22
Member
8674 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2016

I didn’t have any emotional reaction to the dress, even though I did cry a few times on my wedding day (so I am a crier in the right circumstances). I don’t regret the dress at all (aside from the fact no one seems to want to buy it second hand). I think it was very flattering and I looked great.

Post # 23
Member
306 posts
Helper bee

The first time I tried on my dress, it was the only one out of the lineup that I immediately was like, “Um, no!” to. I thought it looked so silly on that I had my mom snap a goofy picture making the most ridiculous smile and dramatic reaction. But then I kept looking ath that picture and thinking about it… So I went back, tried it on, and it had chaned to, “OK, let’s do this one.” No big emotional reaction, just me being kinda silly about it, dancing around, and laughing. Then when it arrived, I put it on and THEN the waterworks started. Seeing it on me in my own home totally made a difference to me. I cried for like 30 seconds and then just kept happy dancing.

You might never cry, and that’s normal. I’m a big cryer. I cry when I see puppies on the street. I cry if someone says something mean. I cry when I’m tired. But if you’re not a big baby like me, you might just never cry.

Post # 24
Member
1627 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

Honestly, it feels like the media has hyped it up to be this big special magical moment that it just… doesn’t happen for everyone? I just tried on dresses until I found one that made me go “Yup, I look amazing in that!” and called it a day. No tears, no huge overwhelming emotional reaction. Some of my friends got it , some didn’t. 

Post # 25
Member
537 posts
Busy bee

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blackparadebride :   I am in a similar boat to you! My options, due to my personal taste(which is expensive) and my self-appointed budget (which is low), are also online without seeing/trying on in person. It’s not very traditional, but not every bride is going to have that cookie-cutter/Say Yes To The Dress/Kleinfeld experience. If you find a dress that brings you joy in some way and that you can picture as your wedding dress, then go for it! If it doesn’t do any of that for you, then maybe keep looking. Just try not to agonize over the decision, because that can make you even more unsure about it (going “dress blind” or whatever).  Good luck Bee!

Post # 26
Member
690 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2019 - City, State

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blackparadebride :  I am usualyl very emotional but sisnt cry or have that reaction in my dress. The feelign I got when I knew it was the right dress was very low-key and simple. I felt it all over my body and my head went quiet. I looked in the mirror as realized I was smiling. I didnt want to take it off and still just want to put it back on and wear it. Thats how I really knew, I just didnt want to take it off!

If you find yourself happy, feeling good and beautiful, then you’ve found the dress. You dont need to freak out or cry to know it is the right one!

Post # 27
Member
30 posts
Newbee

I had a little bit of emotion when I tried on the first dress due to all those “getting married” feelings, but it wasn’t because the dress is THE one. The dress I ended up buying I just felt really comfortable in it but didn’t have that special feeling. Even putting on accessories and veil only makes me feel “complete”, not “omg I’m crying”.

Post # 29
Member
229 posts
Helper bee

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blackparadebride :  yay!!! I am stoked you found a dress! I scrolled past the entire page 2 comments just to see how this played out haha 

please update with a pic when you can 🎉🍾💍 

I think all I will be looking for is to feel beautiful as well. I am not emotional when it comes to this kinda stuff and I am uncomfortable in dresses so I just want to feel cute and not like some imposter haha

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