Post # 1
I am a spendaholic…
My SO and I are trying to save for a house atm and he works 6 and a half days a week and barely gets any time to himself and lately I have had friends inviting me to weekends away and bowling dates with girlfriends and shopping etc.. etc.. and he has been telling me to go and have fun but I always feel horrible for spending so much money.. we both work full time (plus he works weekends) but he doubles my salary and I guess I just feel horrible that I get to have fun and spend money while he works so hard to make it.. Like over the weekend I spent $150.00 on clothes/handbag even though I know we are meant to be saving!!!!! and I just feel horrible..
I shouldn’t get to spend money while he is working but I can’t seem to stop myself!!!! I always feel like I’m buying something.. even if it is just things like make-up or shampoo its almost like I HAVE TO buy something because we have money!!
I need to learn to say NO to people when they invite me places.. at least while we are trying to save for a house!
ETA: Just to clarify… We put a set sum of money away every week for saving, board, bills etc and I only spend what is left over.. I don’t spend our bill money or board or anything like that..
Post # 3
@Brickette: Best thing I learned to do was to SAVE FIRST. As in, I have $700 transfered to an online savings account (separate from my normal bank) the day after my paycheck is deposited.
1. It prioritizes savings and the money is “gone” before you can spend it.
2. The funds are not readily available to spend on “spur of the moment purchases.”
3. When you look at your bank account, you look/feel broke–so you don’t spend as much money.
You might consider this strategy…it has worked really well for me! I used to be the same way and make impulse purchases all the time.
Post # 4
@bmo88: Thanks for the idea, we also put money away each week in our savings account and pay our bills as soon as we get paid, I only ever use the “left over money” which is there for things like food, fuel and things like that.. but I still feel bad because its OUR money but I’m the one getting new handbags because “ohhh its on special so I NEED it”
Post # 5
If you have trouble saving, you might want to use cash only. That way you can take out however much money you want to spend a week and ONLY spend the cash. Leave the cards at home so you’re not even tempted. If you’re really having trouble, you can even freeze your credit card!~
Post # 6
I have the same issue. i do the budgeting but I also end up spending most if not all of the extra cash. Somehow we go over more times than not and have to borrow back from the savings. In instances where we have random bills or expenses come up it all comes out of savings because we have no cash reserves in checking from week to week. It makes me feel bad about myself but im out of ideas. I don’t think I can do the cash thing because I don’t know where the money goes thEn.
savings gets set aside immediately and bills get paid, we budget for things like gas and groceries and we don’t use credit most of the time. But still I end up borrowing against savings way more than I should.
Post # 7
Has this always been a problem for you? Like AlwaysSunny suggested, it would be a good idea to put your CC away and just use cash. Make a budget spreadsheet or just carry around a notepad and jot down everything you buy and how much it cost. Sometimes seeing how much you spend on frivolous things can shock you back to reality.
Post # 8
Thanks for the idea ladies.. We actually don’t have a credit card.. we only have a debit card/savings card so when I do spend money I am only spending money we have and luckily not earning interest!
I do like the idea of writing down everything I buy, that might be a nice shock for me.. My SO handles the budgeting and bill paying so when we need things he will always make sure we have money for it but I have a bad habbit of just buying things because its in front of me.. I have always been like that. Since we have started sharing money I have gotten like 70% better than I was but I still feel bad for doing it! Like today.. I bought a pair of tights of eBay.. they were only like $13 but its still money I shouldnt be spending.. that $13 could have gone into savings!!!
Post # 9
@Brickette: It’s a good sign you realize the money could go into savings – you just have to work your way up into saying that before buying it! 😉
I used the write-it-down method and in about a month, I noticed a big difference.
Post # 10
@everyheart: Excellent I will try that then as of today!! I feel silly even posting about it because its not like I’m spending our savings or bill money but I think it’s better if I stop the bad habbit now before it ever gets to that!!
Post # 11
I’d agree with PPs, very good advice there, but I’d add that if you’re a spendaholic, then budget a little play money in as well. Save first always, so it’s not even there to spend. But rather than cutting out all your shopping cold turkey, maybe give yourself a small amount every week to be able to spend on you. That way you know you can afford it since it’s in your budget, and also it may keep you from spending too extravagently and impusively if you haven’t shopped or gone out in awhile. And then you can choose if you want to save up your play money to go on a trip, or just spend it on random little things 🙂
Post # 12
@bmo88: This. I was never a saver until we got engaged. We’re paying for almost the entirety of our wedding so once that ring was on my finger the weekly trips to Target stopped and money went into the savings instead of towards other stuff.
Fiance and I are trying to get better about the going out $, but recently we’ve had birthdays and already scheduled date nights and other special occasions that we didn’t want to skip on. The twice weekly happy hours, however, we can do without.
Post # 13
@Brickette: I am like this in a way. But, I’ve started really thinking about what I’m buying. I’m a lover of all things Coach, so I started going to their factory store. If I find something there I like, even if I have the cash, I walk out and if I still am really thinking about the bag 3 days later, I go back and see if they still have it. By just waiting and really thinking aobut what I’m buying, I’ve saved a ton of money 🙂
Post # 14
@Brickette: How about talking to your SO and having him hold you more accountable to your spending? You obviously know that you are spending more money than you should be, and he seems to encourage this… what if he stopped doing that? That way you aren’t trying to curb your spending all on your own.
Post # 15
@Brickette: Mint.com is an amazing budgeting tool that my Boyfriend or Best Friend has been using for a couple of months. Basically, it securely links to your bank account and tracks your spending habits. Then it sends you a report breaking down your spending/saving and great tips to improve. It’s free and my Boyfriend or Best Friend absolutely loves it!
Post # 16
@Brickette: I like to shop to but I don’t always spend. If I see something I want then I wait a few days to a week. I usually don’t want it as badly then. I still like to go to the mall for fun but I don’t always walk out with something. I was able to buy a house too just last year and you will love shopping for that hehe