- 4 years ago
- Wedding: September 2013
So i have been at my job for a year and a week. It’s been 12 months of crazy ups and downs. I am a customer service associate for an appraisal and title management company. Basically we are the middleman between lending institutions (banks) and appraisers who value homes.
Customer service isn’t what you’re picturing though – yes, we answer a ton of calls, but we also do a LOT of admin stuff – order entry, order maintenance, billing, customer account maintenance, updates, etc.
We are a nation-wide company working in all 50 states. We have hundreds of customers whose products, regulations, procedures, and preferences are all crazy different.
While most jobs you can be trained in a few weeks, this job has 3 months of intense training and there is ALWAYS continuing education because the industry changes so much.
And everyone acknowledges that most associates don’t start to 100% “get” the job until they are working there for about 6-12 months.
While I definitely recognize that I’ve improved and learned a lot in my 12 months, I still feel like I’m just not cutting it.
We get reviewed on our work and phone calls every month. I’ve had scores as high as 98% and as low as 76%. I am SO all over the place. My consistency is awful, and I don’t know why. I’ve never had this problem at a job before.
Some days are awesome and I feel comfortable and confident, other days are awful and I am a bumbling mess and I feel like an idiot.
Angry customers get to me really easily and I fumble through the calls with no confidence and no assertiveness.
I bust my BUTT to try my best and get better and learn more but it doesn’t seem to matter.
Things hit me really hard last night at our company Christmas party. Every quarter, the departments give out “commendations” to those employees who go the extra mile.
Well, a girl who was hired 4 months after me got the commendation from our department. And now I am officially the only person in our department to never have a commendation. And it really hurt.
I know I’m not perfect and there is still room for improvement. But I am trying SO SO HARD but it doesn’t seem to matter.
People have said that maybe I’m just in the wrong industry. And that may be true, but that really sucks because the company is great. We have great benefits, lots of growth, great morale, and the girls I work with are absolutely amazing. I literally love them.
I’ve never been in such a positive work environment. But I don’t understand how I can be in such a positive, encouraging envorinment and be falling on my face like this.
I’ve considered looking for another job, but I am scared because I have been through the ringer with jobs over the past 2 years and I know it can be so much worse.
Here’s a brief run-down so you know what I’ve gone through:
I do not have a degree. I attended a few semesters at community college, and although I did very well, I hated it and was miserable. I was going through a lot (family stuff, personal stuff, financial stuff) so I did not finish. I’ve considered going back to school but I don’t know what for, where, how, etc. But that’s a whole other post……
My first full time job was at a heavy equipment dealership. I was a receptionist for 2 months before I was promoted to a sales assistant. I was there for 4 years and did really well. The only problem was that the company was very old school and there was no room to move up. And I worked there when the economy was really bad so they froze everyone’s salaries and I couldn’t live on what I was getting paid.
My next job was at a psychiatric doctor’s office. I was only there for 2 weeks because it was so awful. The office manager and her assistant were horribly rude people who sat there and read through patients’ charts and laughed at their symptoms. I got yelled at 4 times on my 2nd day of work for asking questions about things I’d never done before.
Next I worked at a plumbing and heating company for a year. This was an okay job but the hours were horribly inconsistent. Sometimes I’d get 20 hours a week and others I’d get 60. It was very stressful and after awhile they started to put pressure on me to sell to our customers, which I am NOT good at.
Then I got a job as a receptionist at a big, elite company downtown. I was getting paid really good money to greet people and order office supplies. The first month was great. But then my supervisor (the CEO’s exec assistant) quit because she couldn’t take the stress. So who did they ask to take her place? ME! After only working at the company for 30 days, they expected me to fill in for her even though I had no experience in that type of postion and barely even knew the CEO (he traveled constantly). To make matters worse, the company was planning a mult-million dollar event with Russian delegates, and who had to coordinate the travel, itinerary, meals, transportation, and secuirty? ME. And even though I did everything that was asked of me and worked 12-14 hour days for 3 weeks straight, after the event was over they fired me because they said I couldn’t handle the pressure. Eff you, jackasses, I was hired as a receptionist.
So then I ended up at the appraial management company, whcih I described above.
And I just don’t know what to do or where to go.
Again, I think I might want to go back to school but I don’t know what I’d go for. And it would be really hard because my schedule constantly changes AND my husband is in school right now.
And we can NOT afford to have one of us not working.
I just feel so out of place where ever I go. And I’m tired of sucking at everything!!!!
People tell me how sweet and smart and polite and responsible I am. But apparently that doesn’t mean anything in the work place these days.
I don’t know. I’m so lost and confused and feeling worhtless.
Does anyone have any advice?
Please be gentle, I’m feeling really awful.