Post # 1
My fiance and I just attended a wedding, and as the festivities began, they started doing some of the EXACT same things we had planned. One in particular is bothering me, because I really wanted to do it, but I don’t want everyone to think we did it because they did-we have been planning this for a month now and had no clue they were doing it until we saw them do it!
The event I am talking about is the garter toss. We are planning on doing the cute “pulling random things from under the dress” routine. But now that they did it, and we have a few of the same guests that will be attending our wedding (including the bride and groom of that wedding) we don’t want to be copycats!
So my thought was that we could still go through with it, I mean we’ve already purchased a few of the random objects he’s going to pull out from under my dress…but now I’m thinking of putting a twist on it and playing a joke on my fiance by having the groomsmen give me something random of theirs on the wedding day (such as their wallet containing their idea, or one of their shoes which would obviously belong to the groomsman not wearing a shoe, and at the end having him pull out one of the groomsmen! hahaha)
What are everyone’s thoughts on this??? Please help!!
Post # 3
@Frazis: I’m not a huge fan of any of those….
I’d let it go and find something uniquely you.
Post # 4
- Wedding: November 2013 - St. Augustine Beach, FL
It will only look like copying to the people who attending their wedding. If you think it can still be fresh for your other guests and you still want to do it make sure your gags are different from theirs. I would try to let the other bride and groom know ahead of time that you had an idea like theirs and really liked how they did it so you hope it comes off as flattery or a compliment and not copying.
Post # 5
On the one hand, it may look like copying. On the other hand, does it really matter? You guys obviously want to do this and the people who will remember this moment at the wedding are most likely the most important people in your lives, like parents, siblings, best friends.. The other guests who perhaps saw the same thing at the other wedding are likely to not remember it in the long run, or probably care that they have seen something similar before. I think your idea of pulling out a groomsmen is unique and quite funny actually and I would be laughing if I saw that done at a wedding. I wouldn’t throw out an idea just because someone before you did it. I know it’s not really the same, but there are only so many ‘elements’ to a wedding that you can use before it’s just ‘copying,’ but putting your own spin on it. I don’t view this as a big deal and hopefully your guests appreciate it, laugh and have fun with it.
If you are really feeling torn then you can approach the other couple, as a PP suggested, but other than letting them know (not asking them ‘permission’), I think you should just go ahead and do it.
Post # 6
I think what you should do is have one of the items your DH retrieves from under your gown be a sign, rolled up like a scroll, that your Darling Husband can then dramatically unroll and read/show to the “audience” that says, “NOTE: By the way, we’ve been planning this routine for MONTHS. We did NOT steal this idea from John and Jane Smith!” I’m sure they’ll howl! 🙂
Post # 7
That’s not unusual. I’ve seen it at quite a few weddings. No one would think you’re copying.
Post # 8
If I were in this situation, I’d probably talk to the couple who’s wedding you just attended who used this idea and say “hey, I absolutely loved that you guys did this because my Fiance and I had actually thought about doing it and we loved how it turned out at your wedding. We’ve even purchased some things for it already! You don’t mind if we do it also right?”
I would rather say that to them, even though you already had the idea before you saw it at their wedding, than them thinking you copied. It depends on the couple, they might be like “ya of course you can, we loved it!” but I highly doubt they would say “umm no sorry.” At least when you guys do it, they’re not going to be sitting there whispering to the other guests “they copied us!” out of shock.
I hope that makes sense, I’m just looking at it from the first couple’s perspective.
Post # 9
@Brielle: hahahahahaha!!! That’s great!
I think people put way to much stock into “copying” wedding ideas. There are only so many wedding ideas out there. Someone has done anything you can think of. It’s all copying. So I wouldn’t worry about it. Do what you think it fun and don’t worry about how it may or may not resemble other people’s weddings. And the majority of your guests will not have been to the previous wedding so I don’t think it matters. But I do really like the idea of pulling out something that is obviously from one of the groomsmen!
Post # 10
Thanks for all the help and advice everyone! Since we’ve already been planning it I think we’ll still do it, but I’m going to trick my fiancé by throwing in groomsmen’s items and an actual groomsman hahahaha I will also tell the other couple that I liked how they did it because we’re going to do it too! They’re nice and I doubt they’ll be offended but it’s probably a good idea so they don’t start whispering 😉