- 3 years ago
Reg bee going anon…
I am very upset about something that happened last night. DH came home at 2am, (Thursday), the time he came home didn’t bother me, it was the fact that he came home drunk as a skunk knowing full well he has to go to work today.
I am upset because this is not the first time and my issue is that he can’t just have 1,2 or 3 drinks, he doesn’t have a limit. He had also made a comment to me yesterday morning saying he hates staying out late because it makes it harder for him to get up in the morning and its even worse when he is hungover. So when he came home late, and drunk last night its like everything he said went out the window.
When he came home I said “when is this going to stop?” I think I am partially in the wrong here because I picked the wrong time to talk with him bc lets be honest, there is not way to rationally argue with a drunk person. Things got heated and he got up and went to sleep on the couch which he has never done before. He called me an asshole which has never done before. In all the years we have been together, the one thing we have never done is curse, call eachother names, and yell at eachother. And last night he did all that. Then the next thing he did was yell at me and told me to “go the f**K inside, and go to bed, don’t make me get up, you don’t want to see what will happen when I get up”<–Whats that supposed to mean? I asked him that, “so this is what our relationship has come to? You threaten me now?” And he said “You have brought me to a dark place that I don’t want to be”
Then he started to basically tell me that I need to accept that this comes with the job that he has. He works in the insurance industry, he deals with a lot of attorneys and the attorneys will take them out for “happy hours” to thank them for their business, but after the happy hour is over he stays out with his friends (he has several friends that work in the same industry). He said “what am I supposed to do just have one drink? two drinks?” And I said yes, pace yourself, its not necessary to have more than 3,4,5 drinks in a few hours when you have work in the morning. This is not sitting well with me. He said to me “do you think I have a drinking problem?” And I said yes I do. He said “do I get up and go to work? Do I drink everyday?” And I said there is such a thing as a functional alcoholic. He got mad. He doesn’t drink every night but at least once a week he will drink a bottle of wine to himself. Then on top of that he goes out at least once a week with attorneys and comes home drunk?
This morning I told him that he owes me an apology. We fought and at first he said he didn’t need to apologize right now. He apologized but I didn’t feel it was sincere.
I am glad I am not going to be home tonight, I am going out with a friend and tomorrow morning I am going with my mom and sister to PA for the night. I am emotional, my horomones are going crazy but at the same time my feelings are valid. I can’t even look at him. I am disgusted and hurt, and I don’t know if I am overreacting, should I just accept this? I don’t know what to do. Do you think he has a problem?
I also want to note that I am pregnant, and I worry because what is going to happen when the baby comes and he comes home drunk and is loud and wakes up the baby? Or if he goes out during the week and doesn’t come home til late upsets me bc I would want his help with the baby. I am just so disgusted and upset!