I think i'm going to 'un-fire' my bridesmaids

posted 1 month ago in Bridesmaids
  • poll: How should I re-ask my bridesmaids?
    make proposal boxes and keep things positive (no talk) : (2 votes)
    3 %
    make proposal boxes and include serious explanation of freakout : (7 votes)
    10 %
    don't have bridesmaids and save the stress : (58 votes)
    83 %
    stop asking strangers online when I know the right answer is A : (3 votes)
    4 %
  • Post # 2
    141 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: June 2020

    Honestly… yikes. Why even put yourself through more drama with the whole bridemaids thing? This whole saga sounds exhausting – dress drama, girls fighting over maid of honor… just forget the whole thing and let them attend your wedding as guests and enjoy themselves and wear whatever they want.

    Post # 4
    141 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: June 2020

    Oh, also… you can’t fire and unfire people that aren’t paid. They’re your friends and they aren’t obligated to do anything at all. I know it’s semantics but it kind of reveals how you feel about them and their role.

    Post # 5
    1272 posts
    Bumble bee

    Based on this post you are not mature enough for marriage.   

    Post # 6
    10029 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: City, State

    I don’t even think you should ask them. You should just tell them they’re back in unless they screw up. 

    Post # 7
    9224 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: October 2013

    i don;t even know the story this is based on.  but maid of honor refers to someone unmarried and matron of honor refers to someone who is married.

    Post # 8
    13707 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: November 1999

    If I were “fired” as a bridesmaid and the bride asked me to come back, I’d probably laugh in her face.

    Post # 9
    2762 posts
    Sugar bee

    Please don’t. This is so cringy.

    Post # 10
    7417 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: October 2014

    this all sounds like people who are creating drama for the sake of having drama. every person in this story. you should probably not have bridesmaids.

    Post # 11
    6926 posts
    Busy Beekeeper

    Arent you already married?

    Post # 12
    2264 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: October 2019 - Chateau Lake Louise

    slomotion :  Come on now; they have to EARN that shit! I’m saying you don’t have TWO maids of honor YOU HAVE A CAGE MATCH TO DECLARE A WINNER. It’s like Highlander – There Can Be Only One.

    xitsperfection :  I get that you and your friends have a whole blunt honesty thing. Cool. Maybe you should try talking to you as if you were one of your friends. If you did you’d likely say, “Self, all that junk that made me freak out before didn’t magically get solved during one conversation. I don’t need a bridal party for everyone to be a big part of the wedding. I’ll just enjoy the rest of this experience without adding back a bunch of drama… OH WAIT I LOVE DRAMA GET THEM BRIDESMAID BOXES OUT HERE RIGHT NOW!!!”

    At least, I assume that’s how it would go.

    If you were my friend, and you tried to un-fire me, I’d try to talk you out of it. I’d tell you we are all excited for you to get married and looking forward to being there, but that the added stress and planning seemed like it wouldn’t do anything but cause more problems. That we can still do all the bridesmaidy things without actually being bridesmaids. 

    Just let it lie. Find other ways to make them feel included, but skip the bridal party. You’ll all be a lot less stressed out that way.

    Post # 13
    39 posts
    • Wedding: August 2020 - Rhodes, Greece

     Why do you have to ask both to be maid of honour? There is no way I’d be asking two people, just to make them feel ‘special’. They’re adults, they need to suck it up and get on with it..

    Post # 14
    2024 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: October 2017

    xitsperfection :  Go back and reread your original thread about “firing” your bridal party. If you do, you’ll realize you need to leave well enough alone on this. 

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