(Closed) I Think My Boyfriend Has PTSD :(

posted 5 years ago in Wellness
Post # 3
Member
1077 posts
Bumble bee

I don’t have any personal experience in the matter but to me it does sound like PTSD. I think approaching him from a place of love and concern and maybe going together at first would help.

 

I have successfully talked a few friends into seeking help for depression and the “Well what are you going to lose going and giving it a shot?” approach seems to help a lot with them (and was what I needed to hear when I was in that place), but I’m not sure if that would work with PTSD.

 

Have you considered getting him a companion animal, like a dog? A lot of people firmly believe that having a pet can really help people with PTSD.

ETA: I also wanted to say good for you for being there for him!

Post # 4
Member
1118 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

I have/had PTSD but not from a military issue. It is a little bugger and can creep up on you ages after the original trauma (mine became a real issue 4 months after the event)

Not sure where you are based, but in the UK you can get access to counselling for PTSD on the NHS. I would advise him to see his doctor and get some help.

Post # 5
Member
9142 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 2013 - St. Augustine Beach, FL

PTSD can last a lifetime.  Depending on how he was discharged from the military, he may still qualify for psychiatric services.  Even though his previous counselling sessions may have left him feeling cured, it’s not uncommon for the same or similar fears to return years later.  He may need to go for regular counseling sessions every couple of years to help alleviate the symptoms of PTSD but he needs to understand he may never be fully cured.  Being based in Bosnia, he probably saw some pretty terrible stuff and while he may do a great job of rationalizing his memories during the day, night-terrors can be difficult to predict and rationalize.

Post # 7
Member
753 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

PTSD CAN last a very long time. I have PTSD from an incident that occured 12 years ago and I still have anxiety/panic attacks/night terrors/etc to this day. Something both of you guys have to understand is that this may be something he will struggle with for the rest of his life. 

 

I would just sit down and talk with him, tell him you’re worried and you think maybe continuing therapy would be beneficial for him. You can’t FORCE someone to get help, but if you present it with concern and love he may do it for himself. 

Post # 9
Member
2651 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2016

If your intereested there is an orgainization that my shcool is partnered with, it’s http://www.pawsandstripes.org/.

Essentially its paring a therapy dog with a soilder with ptsd. The organization rescues dogs, trains them to be therapy dogs and then pairs them up with a soilder.  It’s a really good organization, and it might help.

Post # 10
Member
556 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: January 2014

Sorry you are going throught this, my uncle fought in Angola when he was young and has terrible issues with that, he had them all his life and still had a happy marriage (like +40 years and counting) but it’s something that never leaves the person, even with terapy and you need to realise that. My uncle, now that he is older, refuses to leave the house and has terrible nightmares about everthing that happen…

I guess the best you can do is stay by his side and reasure him you are not going anywhere, and that you all in 🙂

 

Post # 12
Member
5221 posts
Bee Keeper

@rcac1208:  since he is a veteran, the VA has a TON of resources for veterans and their families. Check there to see if you can get some information. 

 

Post # 13
Member
1326 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

It does sound like PTSD. Incidentally, I was in a serious relationship with a man who’d been in the air force during that same conflict. He saw a lot of nasty stuff and I believe it caused him to become a hardened person. Everyone reacts differently to traumatic situations, but the horrors of war are particularly hard.

The good news is that society is a hell of lot more progressive about treatment for PTSD now than they were many years ago. There are many programs and support groups available for veterans suffering PTSD, especially since so many are doing multiple tours of duty right now.

Post # 15
Member
489 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

@rcac1208:  I know how you feel. My Darling Husband was in the military over 10 years ago and still suffers from PTSD. He someties randomly breaks down over certain “trigger” things. When we first got together he had full blown night terrors every night, with crying and thrashing. It’s gotten much better in few years we have been together. My only real advice is to keep doing what you’re doing. Listen to his concerns, remind him how much you love him and that he is safe (just like you’re doing), and if it’s really bad I suggest both couples and single counciling. There are a lot of resources you can take advantage of through the military as well. We personally neve sought any of that out because my Darling Husband is VERY stubborn and he likes to do things his own way. It’s a really rough thing to go through, and at times it can be really hard. I wish you luck. PM if you need someone to talk to =]

 

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