Post # 1
My Maid/Matron of Honor got her dress yesterday and texted me a picture of it saying she’d gotten it. I texted back, “How does it look?” and got no response, but I figured she was busy with work and didn’t worry about it.
Later, I was reading her blog (our closest friends all keep blogs to keep up with one another since we live all over the country) and she said, “I got the bridesmaid’s dress today. All I can say so far is it needs some altering. The draped sleeve is not right. The color is not what I was expecting either. But if J likes it, I like it, right? Right!”
I was kind of surprised by this! She and my sister, the other bridesmaid, both okayed these dresses when I sent them to them, which is the only reason I chose these. I wouldn’t have chosen a dress if either of them had said there was something they didn’t like about it! I just had two things in mind when I chose them: 1. Try to pick something as interesting as possible, given the limits there are with bridesmaid’s dresses. (They’re only so different; I mean, they are your standard formal dress for the most part.) And 2. I wanted them to be fairly inexpensive since I know the girls will only wear them once and all that. These dresses I chose were $89 and I thought that was great.
I’m just a little lost as to what I should do now. I’m not mad at her, as I really don’t think she thought I’d read that and have my feelings hurt. And I’m not mad, but I just feel like… I don’t know, like I picked out some terrible dress or something! And I don’t want her to have to wear a dress she hates, so I just don’t know if I should call her and tell her that if she doesn’t like it, I’m fine with her sending it back and picking out something else (as long as it’s complementary to the other bridesmaid’s dress) or if I should just let her alter it and not worry about it anymore. I’m not mad and I wouldn’t be saying that out of spite; I just genuinely don’t want her to wear a dress if she sincerely doesn’t like it… which it sounds like she doesn’t. I wouldn’t mind a couple “This needs to be fixed” comments if there had been something, ANYTHING, positive said about the dress, but it was pretty much all negatives!
What would you do? Just forget about it and let her wear this dress, or let her know she’s free to return it and pick out another if she likes?
Post # 3
I honestly wouldnt worry about it. If she didnt speak up to tell you she didnt like then I would ignore any comments she is making about it to other people. You cant win them all I guess.
Post # 4
It sounds like it just wasn’t what she was expecting, but I would just forget about it and have her wear the dress.. if she hasn’t said anything to you then she can’t hate it that much.
Post # 5
Well, my sisters AND my one Bridesmaid or Best Man straight up said they didn’t like the dress I picked. AFTER they all agreed on it AND ordered it. I told them to change it if they want to. I can’t really be bothered.
Post # 6
If I was in your place I’d forget about it. She didn’t dislike it enough to tell you about it, don’t stress it. I’m sure you have dozens of other things to worry about.
Post # 7
I’d say don’t worry. If it was that huge of a deal she’d talk to you about it. Let her get it altered and wear it.
I know my Maid/Matron of Honor doesn’t like her dress too much but told me as long as I like it, that is what matters and she doesn’t have to wear it again.
Post # 8
I went with my Maid/Matron of Honor and one of my BMs to pick out the dress and they both liked it. I later came to learn a different Bridesmaid or Best Man doesn’t like the dress but she could have come when we picked it but didn’t.
I wouldn’t stress about it too much, if she really hated it she probably would have said something. She is wearing it for you anyway and its your wedding so I think its more important that you like the dress and fits with your theme and colors etc.
Post # 9
Awww I’m sorry you’re in that situation. I feel like I know how you feel–I am worried that my BMs don’t like their dresses. My sisters are my MOHs and they are wearing one style of dress, and I think they legitimately like it, but the BMs have a different dress that is slightly different, but similar style, and they all agreed on it. However, I get the feeling they don’t all love the dress, either. Everytime I ask about it I get, “I will wear whatever you want,” and “The dress is fine.” I thought they all liked it–that’s why we went with it!
Don’t you wish people would have spoken up!!??!!
PS–I’m still in love with both of the dress choices but I just feel bad making them pay for dresses they don’t like. I could be wrong, they may like them, but it doesn’t seem like it too much… 🙁
Post # 10
I would let this one go – she didn’t tell you before… and you’ve got much bigger fish to fry in wedding land 🙂
I think it’s also partly that it’s a blog and there’s some peer pressure out there that you’re *supposed* to not like your bridesmaid dress and be funny and sarcastic in bloggyland.
In any case – move on and waste no stress on this 🙂
Post # 11
Really I wouldn’t worry about it. Even if she dislike’s the dress she should suck it up and wear it because you are her friend and you are the bride. I know the last wedding I was in, we are talking like 7 yrs are so ago the dresses were uglyyyyy but I wore it anyway because that is what my friend chose for a dress.
Post # 12
Thanks, girls! I’m just going to let her alter it however she wants (I think she wants to bring the hem up and tighten up the draped sleeve) and hopefully when she sees it with hair/accessories/shoes, she’ll realize that it looks a lot better than just trying it on after a work day!