(Closed) I think we are going to postpone the wedding…

posted 10 years ago in Emotional
  • poll: What would you do?

    Wait till after school

    Just do it as planned

    Other...explain in post

  • Post # 3
    6317 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: December 2013

    @dancingunderthestars:  Honestly if I were in your position I’d prioritize. Marrying the guy I love would be the #1… and therefore I would be happy to have a small, inexpensive ceremony, or just elope. I plan on eloping anyway, so the idea is something that I’ve always liked. I understand girls who have their heart set on a big wedding, but at the same time it’s ONE day. You could elope and have the honeymoon – that would save you a big chunk of change.

    I agree w. your reasoning, and I think that in some ways waiting would be good, but on the other hand then you’re not going to be married for a while, which sucks.

    I want a ring and a honeymoon so I am cutting the big wedding. Yeah it’s an easy decision for me not to spend thousands on a wedding because I am not a big wedding person, but it’s about priorities. I’d rather have an expensive ring and nice honeymoon than throw away thousands on one day of my life. We’ll still make the ceremony special, just nothing compared to what post people spend.

    Post # 6
    6592 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: November 2013 - St. Augustine Beach, FL

    The financial aid issue is a major one for me since that’s the only way I was able to pay for graduate school.  Does that mean you wouldn’t be able to finish school if you get married?  It’s hard to go back after a few years out of school and you may never qualify for financial aid again.  Have you discussed it with a financial aid advisor at your school?

    Post # 7
    1494 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: September 2013 - B&B

    Have you looked more into what being married would do to your financial aid? If you haven’t already, I would talk to your bursar’s office or whoever to get a better idea of what that would do to you. That would probably be what I would consider my biggest obstacle…

    I think it’s great that your Fiance is willing to consider everything else going on in your lives and work on this together with you!

    And… for your consideration… my cousin and his new wife honeymooned in St. Lucia. They had the most amazing time and loved every second of it. But you could always get married and do a honeymoon on your one year anniversary. I have friends that are doing that now! They are so excited. And she’s very happy she did that because after their wedding, they just took a couple days to relax, (no travel, new places, etc.) and now they are getting this awesome vacation, that is very much needed after their first year of marraige (and they have two young kids…)

    Post # 8
    2143 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: August 2013 - Brookfield Zoo

    Would you be losing out on any deposits??  If so, do you gain more in financial aid etc. than you lose from the deposits?

    From what it sounds just from what you’ve written, I think it’s a smart move to postpone until you’re more financially stable, plus it’s true, school is very costly and losing financial aid status would be big.

    Post # 9
    6317 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: December 2013

    @dancingunderthestars:  Ooh I love your dress 🙂

    Hmm you definitely are in a pickle. I mean if you’re planning on an inexpensive ceremony anyway and that’s too much then maybe waiting IS your best option. Then again, you could always do the ceremony as planned (maybe cut out a few things since you’re running out of time), and then postpone the honeymoon. Not ideal but at least you’d be married. You could have the honeymoon as something to look forward to when you’re done school. Go all out and rent one of those private cabin things in St. Lucia (my friend did that) 🙂

    Post # 10
    503 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: August 2012 - Iowa

    Ultimately its your decision…

    All your reasoning makes total sense, but I know I wouldn’t want to wait!

    If you have your venue and caterer booked then won’t you be losing money to wait, expecially if you postpone for a couple years? You can do as much or as little as you want for a wedding; take a weekend, get your girls together and get as much done as you can.

    Honeymoon – you can always take this later. My fiance and I are getting married in August but not planning a honeymoon till this winter. Take a mini-moon right away, take the big one later.

    Financial Aid would probably be a big one, maybe look into this more on if you would or wouldn’t be eligible. I wouldn’t say that school loans are something to ‘not be proud of’ either. While it sucks to have, it’s ‘good debt’ that is bettering yourself and your education.

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