(Closed) I want it both ways…pity party

posted 7 years ago in Family
Post # 1
Member
180 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

I can’t resolve these feelings I have.  On one hand I have always asserted that because I am over 30 and independent, I will be paying for my own wedding.  I don’t “need” any help nor do I want anybody’s opinions. 

The problem? I got what I asked for.  Nobody in my family seems at all interested nor have my parents (who have paid for all 5 previous siblings weddings) offered any help. Also, they are currently planning and paying for another sister’s wedding. She is getting the whole nine yards…  I’m on the sidelines with a wedding that will be the size of her bridal shower.

I know I set it up this way and I feel good knowing I’m having my wedding on my terms but I just feel a little abandoned…

It’s silly really now that I see it all written out…

Post # 3
Member
459 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

@Cougar09:  Have you tried bringing it up to your family? I’m one of those super independent people too. I did the whole “I’m going to pay for it all myself” thing for about a month then totally caved. Are they able to help you with your wedding since they’re already helping a sister currently? If they can, I’d ask them to help you cover your biggest bill at least. That way you can have a big chunk taken care of and still be pretty independent by taking care of the rest. Also, has FI’s family offered to chip in? I’d sit with Fiance and figure out how much you too can or are willing to contribute and what kind of wedding you want. There’s no harm in you and Fiance splitting the wedding…his family can help out with his part and your family can help you with yours.

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