(Closed) I want to cancel the wedding…

posted 8 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Hostess
18643 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

Is your dad going to lose a lot of his money if you cancel?  Is there any way that you can delegate so you can have some help with the planning and don’t feel so stressed out?

Post # 4
Member
577 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 1969

Do it. Wear your gorgeous dress to the courthouse, check into a hotel, and enjoy your new husband.  If your families are being difficult, I would ask for forgiveness rather than permission ๐Ÿ™‚  It’s about you two, not everyone else.

Post # 5
Member
1927 posts
Buzzing bee

Why don’t you compromise and have a Catholic wedding in the church but only invite VERY close family.   Then, if you want to celebrate afterward, you can just go to a nice restaurant. You and your family get the religious aspect of the wedding which is important.. but you don’t have to worry about all the details/trouble/money that goes into a huge wedding with a big reception and lots of guests.

Post # 7
Member
234 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

What is it that’s stressing you out most about your wedding, and what can you do about it.  It sounds like you have a lot of the big stuff done already – dresses, vendors, venues, etc – so maybe you just need to let more of the little stuff go?  It gets so easy to spend days looking at a million different kinds of invitations or centerpieces and driving yourself nuts over which one is best, but if it really doesn’t matter to either of you, can you try dropping things of your list and see how you feel?  Call your florist and say “give me XX color centerpieces that cost XX dollars” and just give her total freedom to figure out what they look like?  Can you buy the first set of invitations that fits your budget that you don’t hate?  It just seems like you’ve done so much work already, and if you’re worried you’ll regret not having a wedding (because your dad will lose money or your family will be sad) then maybe try ramping down your planning to a bare minimum.  You can always decide to do the court wedding later if you’re still stressed (and I’d totally vote for wearing your dress to the courthouse if you do!)  Especially once you start looking at wedding blogs, it’s easy to start obsessing over favors and out of town bags and escort cards, but you can still have a lovely wedding with your family without any of that.

Post # 8
Member
2788 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: January 2011

If your dad won’t lose anything and neither will anyone else – then what are you waiting for?!?

Post # 9
Member
1927 posts
Buzzing bee

If you are not attached to the specific church I don’t think you would have a problem finding a catholic church in your area that has an opening earlier than October!  Esp if you limit the guest list to just close family you could have the wedding on a Friday night and you would have no problem getting a date in the near future! 

Post # 11
Member
1927 posts
Buzzing bee

Are you concerned that your family will be upset if you didn’t get married in the church?  Or because you didn’t have a big blow out party?

Post # 13
Member
348 posts
Helper bee

You can absolutely wear your beautiful dress to a courthouse wedding, or small church ceremony.  Invite the 5-10 people you really can’t imagine not being there, then book a private room in a restaurant for after.  If, afterwards, you find that you do want to celebrate with a lager group, have a big party for your first anniversary.  But seriously, do not go through with a huge wedding if you don’t want it.  Weddings are for joy, not for making you cry all the time.

Post # 15
Member
979 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

Go to the court house, wear your dress, have the party on your set date so you won’t lose out on any of the deposites.  The family will just have to get over it.  Its not worth a nervous breakdown.

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