- 6 years ago
- Wedding: July 2013
First wedding related post! Yay!
So, we are looking to get married when we graduate college in 2yrs, and we are at a bit of an impasse already.
I hate planning, I am a habitual procrastinator, and I will likely be late to my own funeral. Because of these lovely characteristic that I possess, the idea of planning a wedding is like a huge black nightmare staring me in the face. Not to mention that I can’t stand being the center of attention.
My dad gives all of his daughters 6k for their wedding/wedding gift and says “do with it what you wish.” I had my mind set that I would spend 3k on the wedding and 2k on the honeymoon, and save the other 1k. To me, the honeymoon is the fun part about the whole “wedding experience.” I have a pretty huge family, and I have been invited to all of my cousins weddings and so forth. We couldn’t invite them all to our wedding with such a small budget.
That is why I proposed eloping, because then I could still buy a beautiful dress and look amazing and be married to my best friend on my honeymoon.
My Fiance, on the other hand, comes from a small family but has lots of non-family members that would *have* to be at our wedding, such as family friends and mentors. His family is from the city and, to be brutally honest, below the poverty line. That means that basically nobody in his family has married, and the few that have (like his brother) just had a simple civil ceremony that nobody in his family really recognized as being legitimate. I think this fact is driving him to want a wedding, because we wants to prove to all of them that he has done better for himself (we live a fairly middle-class life). Plus he insists that if we had a big reception, we could probably make enough back in gifted money that the expensive of the wedding would be negligible.
But honestly, I don’t want to plan a wedding, and neither does he! In fact, he completely refused to talk about it, basically. The idea of planning something like that is so daunting, but he really really wants it, and is sort of demanding that I plan it all.
Ughhhh! What should I do? What would you do if you were me?
(I just want to elope, not in secret, and do a “were married!” letter to the huge amount of people we would have to inform, like 200+)