Post # 1
…but the problem is, I had been planning to get rid of all the father/daughter stuff. I’ll be walking up the aisle either by myself or with both parents, we weren’t planning on a father/daughter dance. I haven’t exactly told my dad any of this, we sort of figured he wouldn’t notice. I’m not close to my dad at all, but my parents are married and occasionally he does something sweet and fatherly. Most of the time though, we’re at each other’s throats.
My mom, on the other hand, is and has always been my best friend. She’s always supportive and since I’ve been through a lot medically, she’s been there through everything. I would not have gotten where I am today without her support. The song “Wind Beneath my Wings” by Bette Midler reminds me of her and I really want to play it at our wedding for her, ideally I’d love to dance with her to it. But the fact that we’re not including the dad stuff… well, I don’t think I could make that work.
It’s disappointing to me that weddings celebrate the father throughout the whole thing by tradition (and the mother of the groom, what about his dad?) and so now I don’t feel right honoring just my mom… is there a subtle way I can do this? I think it would be drawn out to have a mother/daughter and father/daughter dance and I don’t want to dance with my dad really anyway, it would be awkward.
Sorry this is a little long, I’m just feeling like there’s no way I can make this work. I hope someone else is more creative than I am!
Post # 3
What if during the toast you get up and say a few words thanking everyone for coming and saying a few nice things about your mom and how much you appreciate her?
Post # 4
Would you consider making it a joint dance… Start with father/daughter and half-way though switch with your mother?
Post # 5
My wedding bouquet was orange and white calla lillies, with ONE single yellow rose in the middle. My moms sister, whom she was very close too, and who has passed away favorite color was yellow, so I told my mom I was going to have one yellow flower in my bouquet for my aunts memory. My mom was super touched.
I too wanted to do something very special for my mom, to have that moment with her like I did with my dad before walking down the aisle and our father/daughter dance.
After the father/daughter dance, I had the DJ call my mom onto the dance floor with me. I took the yellow rose out of my bouquet and presented it to my mom and placed it in an engraved vase. It was a very touching moment.
Post # 6
@kate169: Wait… is the bride expected to give a toast? Crap. Lol, I hate speaking… I guess I could, but would it be odd to single out my mom and completely leave my dad out of everything?
@auggiefrog: I would but the only song I really want to dance to my mom with is that one, and since my dad isn’t exactly supportive of me, I don’t want to dance to that song with him at all… it seems unfair to my mom to give him equal honor when she’s done so much more for me…
@jtsing: Aw, that’s very sweet 🙂
Post # 7
@galloway111: Haha no you don’t have to…I didn’t! But I think typically either the bride or groom gets up during the toast and says thanks for coming blah blah. Sometimes it is one of the parents that does that if they paid/are hosting.
Post # 8
@galloway111: Your mom is a wonderful person and you can do whatever you like. Be happy that you have her and cherish these moments.
Post # 9
@kate169: Oh good, lol. We planned on Fiance saying a few words but I was hoping that got me out of it, haha.
@Soladylike: It sounds great but my dad would be super hurt if I had a mom/daughter dance and no father/daughter dance, since F/D is the actual tradition anyway. And I know some of my family would be put off, I don’t want to do that to them at my wedding.