Post # 1
But I can’t. It’s not legal. But if it were…
So yesterday they “overlooked” one of his feedings. He is 4 months old & still on breastmilk/formula (no cereal or solids yet) so he typically eats about every 3 hours or so. Yesterday when I went to pick him up, he was in a VERY bad mood. This isn’t normal for him, usually he’s fine, so it threw a flag for me. I asked the girl when he’d eaten last & she said she didn’t know. She went to get his daily info sheet & I noticed he ate 5 oz at 10:30am & then he didn’t eat again until 3:30pm. Granted, I picked him up after 5pm, so he HAD eaten before I arrived, but he only screams like that when he’s hungry & I believe skipping a meal made him really fussy!! I about came undone. The main girl that usually takes care of him could not provide me with an explanation. She mumbled something about being on break during the time he would have normally been fed, & that maybe the other worker fed him & just didn’t write it down blah blah blah… She sat there like a whipped dog with her head hanging low while she fed him a bottle before I took him home.
When I got home I called the director (who, because of a few previous instances I don’t have much confidence in) & she apologized & said she would “address it immediately”. i asked her to call me back today & let me know what she found out after talking to the other worker, but they’re stupid & I’m sure she’ll try to CTA & just say she forgot to write it down. I love my son more than anything & I want his standard of care to be as high as possible. He’s too little to tell me what’s going on yet, so I want to have full faith in the facility to tend to his needs 100%. I’m on the waiting list for 2 more daycares in my area, but the lists are months long! I’m so tired of dreading him going there everyday. We can’t afford a nanny, so that’s out.
Anyone else want to punch their daycare people?
Post # 3
@okqueenbee: Your post kind of left a bad taste in my mouth. I’m a mom too so I get it. You want the absolute best for your child and expect him to be well taken care of at daycare. The violent nature and name calling in your post seems a little harsh though. I hope you are able to find a daycare that better meets your standards and needs soon!
Post # 4
@okqueenbee: It definitely sounds like you need a new daycare if this isn’t the first incident. I’m sorry the waiting lists are so long 🙁 I personally think some home daycares do a great job so maybe that is something to consider. No matter where you go, people make mistakes and you have to do your due diligence whether it’s a centre or a house. I hope you find somewhere you are comfortable with soon!
This isn’t the same thing, but my pup’s old daycare forgot to feed him one day and I lost my mind. We brought him to a new place right away. Eventually your kid will be able to talk, but he would be a silent victim and I couldn’t risk it! As stupid as some people will say it is, my little guy is my baby for now so I have some concept of how you feel but not to the same degree.
Any loved one needs to be left somewhere trustworthy, that much is the same regardless of fur!
Post # 5
@Ballet513: I agree with this! While I sympathize with your frustration, the thought “punching the workers at my baby’s daycare in the face” seems irrational and out of line.
Post # 6
@okqueenbee: Good for you for being so in tune to his moods that you noticed something being off. Its really hard to leave your babies in daycare, but you’re right….red flags about anything can and should set off alarms for you. You have to advocate for him and be really alert under the circumstances.
If the Director is smart, she WILL address it today, and heads will roll. Not a thing wrong with a Mama Bear protecting her cub!
Post # 7
@okqueenbee: “She sat there like a whipped dog with her head hanging low while she fed him a bottle before I took him home. “
Wait. After all this you had them feed your child while you were standing right there?
Post # 8
It sucks that you don’t have confidence in the daycare where your son is enrolled. However as someone who works in a daycare, mistakes can happen. I’m not saying that it’s acceptable, but with so many kids to work with, sometimes things get a little bit chaotic. It’s not an excuse because those who work in daycares do their best to take care of the kids in their care, but just like in a home, sometimes things are forgotten. From the sounds of it, those who are working in the daycare are taking your concerns seriously and looking into the problem. I don’t think it’s fair for you to say that you “want to punch the workers in the face”. It’s a long day working with that many babies and they’re doing their best. Please try to be more understanding; I’m sure they were of your concerns and will do their best to ensure it never happens again.
Post # 9
@okqueenbee: FWIW, it sounds like the woman who normally takes care of your son does her job very well, and cares that she does it well. If the director doesn’t do anything to address the possible situation (even if they actually fed him and didn’t write down that feeding, it’s a big deal because documenting EVERYTHING is how you make sure things are properly run, as well as CYA in legal problems) maybe you can ask her to make sure that he gets all his feedings? Heck, if she can do that, she deserves a good word in the ear of whoever’s in charge there.
Post # 10
@CreatureFromTheBlackLagoon: You would be AMAZED how many parents do this. Same thing with diapers: “Oh, I see So-and-So hasn’t been changed in an hour and 30 minutes. I know it’s 6:05 and the center closes at 6, but can you change him for me?”
OP- Sorry your baby missed a feeding! I worked in infant daycare for a couple of years, and it does happen. Sometimes it just doesn’t get written down, sometimes your kid is napping when it’s their bottle time and the feeding runs really late. Sometimes the teacher is on break and a total frigging idiot comes in to “help”, and messes up the whole schedule.
If this is a repeat offense (them not feeding him), I don’t blame you for being mad at ALL! Your poor baby shouldn’t go hungry. But if this was a once-off, I wouldn’t be too mad. All sorts of bizarre things happen in infant rooms.
Post # 11
@CreatureFromTheBlackLagoon: I found that odd too. We are all different and handle things differently but probably I would have felt so horrible for the poor baby that I would have carried and fed him myself. I would have been so ticked too that the last thing I would have wanted was for them to feed the baby.
Post # 12
My son is 4 months old as well, and I know all babies are different, but with him, there is pretty much no way a caregiver could miss his hunger signs and just not feed him. When he gets hungry, it’s about 5 minutes of pouting, restling, and whining, and then its full blown screaming until he gets his bottle. There’s no way that could be overlooked for 3+ hours.
I’m leaning towards him taking an extra long nap during his usual feeding time, or them forgetting to write down his feed in the book.
If they really did mess up and miss the feeding, let me tell you I’m jealous that you have a baby that would be so mild mannered while being so hungry.
Post # 13
I have my daughter in one of the best daycares in the area (I’m lucky enough to work for a place to get a discount, otherwise we couldn’t afford it). All I know is, things do happen, even in the nice/expensive places. I know that sometimes they get overwhelmed and other people have to come in to help and they don’t always write things down. Maybe he slept through that feeding? My daughter is 5 months and I know even in MY care she’s slept through a feeding every once in a while and I will usually wait until she wakes up instead of waking her. Regardless of that though, I don’t like how no one knew or could give you an explanation. I like to talk to the daycare teachers about their day and my daughter’s day when I pick her up and I’d be pretty annoyed if there was a 3-4 hour period where no one knew who was taking care of her.
Post # 14
Do you bring pre-made bottles? If so, was there an extra one full- that should tell you right away if he missed a feeding. I understand your frustration, but if you presented the same attitude to the daycare provider as you did here (wanting to punch them in the face) you are not going to have a very good realtionship with them- and if something does need to be brought to your attention, they are going to be afraid to tell you.
Post # 15
Some of these responses are unbelievable and so disappointing. Making excuses for the daycare providers and making a new Mom feel worse? I’ve seen people on here have more compassion for their animals.
Babies require a few basic things, and forgetting to feed them for whatever reason is just not acceptable. What’s next? Letting him lay in a filthy diaper all day because someone was on a break? NO. This was not skipping tummy time. This was depriving him of the nourishment he needs, and who knows how many other times its happened before?
Blaming this Mom for being harsh and upset is ridiculous. Unless you’ve been there, save your judgment. Hopefully this is a one time thing and will be resolved by the Director. It still isn’t acceptable no matter how you look at it.
Post # 16
Is it crazy to call them during the day to check in? Just for a few days since this just happened?