(Closed) I was dumped as bridesmaid

posted 5 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 17
467 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: March 2015

loulou29:  OK, no. I can’t believe what I’m reading. Your ‘friend’ is a grade A bridezilla and you are best out of the situation.

Who expects a bridesmaid to fly out to dress fitting 4 times, I mean really who does that?? Then she changes her mind and expects you to fly out again, on a work day, at short notice. I can’t believe you went, you’re a better person than me! and she STILL dumped you?! What on gods earth does this ridiculous woman expect.

Did she ever offer to contribute to the cost, or apologise for inconveniencing you? Thought not…..


Post # 18
489 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

loulou29:  You didn’t do anything! I cannot believe she dumped you for a bridesmaid for that when you have already paid for and gone on FOUR trips for a dress and then she changed her mind.  That isn’t your fault at all.  She is being a bridezilla, hands down.  I’m really sorry about your friend and it probably will change your relationship.  The fact that she would dump you as a bridesmaid over this is really mean.  I guess, if it was me, that would be my biggest issue.  I feel horrible for my bridesmaids having to pay money and while I am not sure if showers are popular over there, I am not requiring them to all be at everything as that just isn’t fair.  

They have to be at the wedding and get their dresses, as far as I am concerned everything else is just extra 🙂  But I am really sorry, because this was nothing you did.  She changed her mind and to already have FOUR fittings, seems extreme in and of itself.  

Post # 19
5154 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2014

loulou29:  I’d dump her as a friend. Get your money back for the flights and dont waste your time or effort getting there. She’s been extremely rude to you. Do you really want a friend like that? 

Post # 20
2969 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

loulou29: I have a few words for her that would probably get me blocked from this site.

Either way, my point is she dumped you as a bridesmaid and you need to dump her as a friend. This is not the kind of person you need to be wasting money, time, and tears over. I agree with your mom… You need to let her go.

Post # 22
1770 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

loulou29:  I would honestly not attend the wedding. After everything you put into this and how she treated you, she does not deserve your friendship.  Don’t waste another dollar on flights to see her.

Post # 25
2156 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

loulou29:  Tell her the truth – that you care about her but that 1000 GBP or however much you spent on the flights was just too much for you to be able to pay at short notice so you wanted to find an alternative solution. And that you are feeling very hurt to be cut out of the wedding party and will not be attending the wedding.

Post # 26
608 posts
Busy bee

loulou29:  “Her hens was all paid for by her family and thats why i was taking her out when I was back the week before her wedding.” 

Again, I’m confused – has the wedding already happened?

Post # 28
413 posts
Helper bee

After reading some of your replies and others responses, I feel that no matter what you do your ‘friend’ is going to act like you’re a super bitch (though you are absolutely not, she sounds like shes a spoiled little brat) and I would just let her. You know your one friend was right if this girl is willing to throw her whole friendship away for one day of her life then why are you stressing yourself over someone so selfish?

OP with friends like her you don’t need enemies. If you go to her wedding you’ll be out money and down on your dignity (in my opinion) so I would look out for write the bride a nice but firm letter about how you won’t be attending the wedding and why and then move on, though you’ve been friends for 16 years it sounds to me it’s been more of her using you as a doormat, I say this because people don’t get that cruel over night. 

Good luck!

Post # 29
1095 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2015

loulou29:  I have bridesmaids in other states. I did not ask NOT ONE to fly in for a dress fitting- I only go with the local one, and update them on FB or via text.

You are ia  whole other COUNTRY. She made you fly 4 times, and did not even meet up with you? Does she think money grows on trees? She needs to get her head out of her a** and get real. Do you want someone in your life who obviously does not give a shit about how much money you have to spend to be at ther side, since she lets you hang high and dry every time?<br /><br />

Post # 30
7432 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2014

Just show your friend this thread. Perhaps it will be the reality check she needs.  

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