Post # 1
I’m going to try my hand at another post. We’ll see how this one goes 🙂
Last week I was on the phone with my mom and she told me a chunk of news that shocked me. I found out my ex from high school (NOT THE ONE THAT I’M TRYING TO GET RID OF THE RING FROM) has gotten a woman prego! Now, I had run into him a few times in my travels back and fourth from my hometown back to where I moved before I got married. He freaked when he saw my rings and found out I’d gotten married only a few months ago. He cussed my husband like a dog and all kinds of stuff.
He left out the part where HE got this woman prego! (out of wedlock, I might add) My mom told me the whole deal. He had moved out and met a girl, (it happens!) then they were stupid ONE time and she ends up with a child. (I don’t know if they had it planned, nor do I even care!)
I know how he can be, after all, we were off and on for 4 years! Now, he and the woman are living with his mom and dad. I figure he had a job, then got mad one day and walked out on it. (He always did that when I knew him).
His mom (which I spent some time with the other day too) is mad as hell at him (and her too) for putting into the situatioin of becoming a grandmother at her age.
I think she wants them to marry and raise the child. I consider that to be one smart move for them, but his mom asked me if I would help them out (daipers, wipes, etc…) I told her, “No, I couldn’t afford it right now.” She freaked on me. It’s like I”M the woman who is prego!! I wouldn’t help them out, even IF they DID have a shower for her and she NEEDED stuff! It’s not my place. I don’t know this WOMAN from adam and I shouldn’t have to buy her things to help her with her OWN mistake.
I look back on this “relationship” (if you can call it that) that I had with this ex and I’m so GLAD I didn’t become pregnant by him. I can only hope he steps up and can learn to be a good father to that baby.
Needless to say, I was WAY WAY shocked at the news and the way he yelled at me for getting married. At least, I married BEFORE I decided to bring a life into the world!
Post # 3
Im kind of confused on why she thinks you should buy stuff for a child that is in no way your respnonsibility. And I dont think you need to be married to have a kid and or raise a kid.
How do you keep running into all your ex’s? Does your hometown only have 50 people in it?
Post # 4
I’m also a bit confused. You’re a newlywed….why are you so involved with your ex’s drama? You should be focused on your happy new marriage, not spending time with your ex’s mother and talking about the unfortunate situation he’s in.
Post # 5
mishelleez I only have 1 ex in my hometown (which is pretty small) and he still stalks me. I don’t go looking for him or anything. I don’t tell him when I’m coming or for how long. He doesn’t even know what town I live in NOW.
I guess his mom thinks that since he and I dated (again, off and on) that I should be partly responsible for buying something for this OTHER girl. I don’t think you have to be married or even engaged to have or raise a child either, but it would make it easier. I’m not going to buy her a thing. (I have bought some other people I went to school with who are getting married, having a child..etc…) only b/c I know them and they are nothing but nice to me and never said an ugly thing to me.
They made the bed, now THEY have to lie in it. I’m not catching heck for something that is years old and gone.
Post # 7
GFoxBride I am not involved in his life. My mom works with his mom and word got around. My mom just told me the news via phone. I don’t go hunting for HIS damn drama, word spreads fast!
Post # 8
Your ex’s mother sounds a bit whacko. Why on earth would she expect you to buy things for this child? Sounds like you should cut off contact with ex and ex’s mother.
Aside from that, I know how weird it feels. I dated a guy from 15-19 or so… I’m now 27. Since we broke up, he has been married and divorced and has two kids by two different women.
Post # 9
I don’t much care for this site any longer. You won’t be seeing me on here any longer!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Personal attacks have come to an end with me!
Post # 10
@go4me77: if you dont want opinions, why do you post things like this? you are judging their family and people who have kids out of wedlock (and all sorts of other people in your other posts), but you get mad when people give their opinions on YOUR behavior/posts.
“We can never judge the lives of others, because each person knows only their own pain and renunciation. It’s one thing to feel that you are on the right path, but it’s another to think that yours is the only path”–one of my favorite quotes.
Post # 11
Too much drama for me here. I’m sorry, but some of these things are just plain ridiculous. All of us in this world have drama at one point or another, but this is just too much. All of your posts are filled with so much drama. Just don’t talk to these people. They aren’t family or anything. I personally feel like you like drama and thrive on it. Who cares about a past ex and his mother? Just stay away from them!!
And I don’t like that you attacked women who have had children before marriage. There are women on Wedding Bee and around the world who have had children out of wedlock and for you to personally attack them? Not ok…
Post # 12
@go4me77: wow! I can speak for myself only. I don’t think anyone wants you to up and leave. I don’t comment too much on your posts but I do read them. You have to look at from the readers perspective. Your last post had some interesting things going on. This one is just weird considering the last one. However, there are some people on here who should just not say anything at all if they can’t say it in a respectable manner. It still may not be what you want to hear or read in this case, but there is a way to say everything.
Yes I wonder too why you are spending time with the ex’s mother. I had a ex from high school. We dated for 4 years. I truly loved him with everything I had but like most high school sweethearts, we broke up. His mother treated me like her own daughter. As she had no girls and I had no mother at the time. BUT, after I started a new serious relationship and later got married to someone else, I sent Christmas cards to his mother. I spent no time with her but I still felt connected to her after all that she did for me when she didn’t have to.
But I agree, you should not have to help them out even if you were close like I was to my ex’s mom.
Post # 13
@blondeeebuckeye: Do you know who’s quote that is. I love it. Can I put it on my facebook?
Post # 14
“she wants them to marry and raise the child. I consider that to be one smart move for them”
Getting married because you have a child together is not a good idea. My parents, 16 and 17, were forced to get married because my mom was pregnant with me. They divorced less than 2 years later. I know of at least 3 other divorces because someone got pregnant.
“HE got this woman prego! (out of wedlock, I might add)”
I had my child out of wedlock, who was planned and wanted more than any baby in the whole world. When people say things like this, it really hurts my feelings because they think my baby was an accident, which is not true.
Post # 15
@edisonsgirl: thanks! i love quotes 🙂 that one is from Paulo Coelho, who is a Brazilian novelist. i had it on my facebook for the longest time! @edisonsgirl–of course you can use it, i’m not that brilliant to come up with something so good 🙂
Post # 16
I think you should just focus on your marriage and try not to think about the ex’s. They do tend to shock you but really focus on your husband now. He deserves all of your attention.