(Closed) I Was Sure My Boyfriend Was Going To Propose…But What He Did Was More Shocking

posted 4 years ago in Waiting
Post # 61
Member
212 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2017

I know this post is now 2 weeks old but I just want to offer a couple of words of support seeing all the nasty comments. First of all, I dont think you need to apologise for your feelings or even worse for not hiding them. Every relationship that strives to persist should be based on honesty and being able to share ourselves with the other and be accepted for who we are and vice versa. Now that out of the way – i think the actions of your man show his dedication, love and care for you and while I understand ypur reasons not to I wish you’d said yes then and there. I hope yout two can figure pr have already figured this out because clearly you already are a family! Forbwhat is worth here in Germany  we dont have that ring tradition…. Mostly if people feel like getting married they talk about it and just do it… Good luck!

Post # 62
Member
3107 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2016 - Surfer\'s Beach, Grand Cayman

I know waiting can be hard, but honestly how could this poor guy win in this scenario other than being a mind reader and proposing only in the manner you had hoped for. Would you prefer he never treats you to a nice dinner in the meantime? You have to learn to let go and let him be ready too, there’s no sense in acting like every moment is worthless unless there’s a shiny ring involved. I can understand you got your hopes up, but if I was your bf I would be very hurt by your reaction. 

Post # 63
Member
2133 posts
Buzzing bee

Post # 64
Member
999 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2017

View original reply
bri1214 :  I know this post is a few weeks old, but I did want to give you some advice..things don’t always go as planned, and that’s ok. Proposals are not always perfect and I really don’t think they have to be..

For what it’s worth…I had no idea my Fiance had a ring and was nervously waiting for the time to ask me. We got into a disagreement and I mentioned (because I admittedly can be a brat) said he didn’t care. He got upset at this, and pulled out the ring box to “show he does care.” I ran into the bedroom after that and pretend it didn’t happen like that…and was so shocked. A few days later he planned a nice dinner at home and had the ring tied to our pets collar. 

Yes it wasn’t the best engagement story I’ll admit…but like I said, proposals aren’t always perfect. Either way, you know he is committed to you.

Post # 65
Member
2 posts
Wannabee

YOU GOT THE PROPOSAL OF A DREAM AND A LIFE TIME. SMH. HE GOT DOWN ON HIS KNEE DUE TO YOU OUTPOURING YOUR TRUE EMOTIONS ON THE HIGHWAY!!!!  ANSWERING WITH A TRUE ANSER. YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO BE REAL AND ACCEPT THAT MOMENT AS TRUE AND SAY YES. IT WAS ROMANTIC, DRAMATIC, MOVIE SCENE STUFF AND THATS WHAT COUNTS. THE TRUE STUFF, THE REAL STUFF, NOT THE STUFF WE EXPECT, BUT WAT ACTUALLY HAPPENS. ALSO, GUYS ARE NO WOMEN. THEY ARE SIMPLE. THEY DON’T CARE ABOUT WHAT WE CARE ABOUT THEY ONLY DO THOSE THINGS TO MAKE US HAPPY. WHEN WE INCLUDE THEM, THEN IT SHOWS THEM THAT THEY HAVE SOME CONTROL IN THE SITUATION. YOU GUYS COULD FROM THAT NIGHT WENT AND PICKED OUT RINGS EXPLAINING YOUR CRAZY STORY AND THAT WOULDA BEEN THE TRUTH ABOUT THE “JOHN AND KATE ” (OR WATEVER UR NAMES ARE) STORY. IT WAS PERFECT, JUST THE DRMATIC GESTURE YOU WANTED AND NEEDED. APOLOGZIE TO THAT MAN FOR GOING ALONG WITH WHAT SOCIETY EXPECTS AND TEACHES YOU AND DO YOU OWN THING! LESS STRESS ON THE MAN WHO JUST WANTS TO KNOW INSTEAD OF FIGURING IT OUT! BEFORE ANYTHING, WE HAD , OUR ANCESTORS HAD COMMMITMENT BY HEART AND UNDERSTANDING, NOT RINGS AND WEDDINGS. THEY LASTED MORE THAN US BECAUSE THEYRE HEART AND UNDERSTANDING WAS IN THE RIGHT PLACE. GET THE LIFE,  NOT THE GLAM.

Post # 66
Member
379 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: February 2017

View original reply
amafurr :  this is an old thread. And stop yelling at the OP with antiquated notions about how simple men are.

Post # 67
Member
2 posts
Wannabee

[content moderated for name calling]

 

Post # 68
Member
9520 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

View original reply
amafurr :  if you are going to insult someone spell the insult right. Name calling is against the TOS you agreed to. Please mind your manners on this site 

Post # 69
Member
28 posts
Newbee

Wow, it’s too bad some replies to your post come across as negative and mean. We should be supporting each other! I’m so sorry things didn’t go as planned for you. I can understand has heart wrenching that can be, especially when you’re just counting down the days to a specific day. 

 

It may be helpful to talk to your SO about what had you so very upset and have another conversation about timelines? His may have changed maybe? I’ve been with my SO for almost 5 years now and I’ve had my fair share of disappointments but we always check in with one another and that helps a great deal. It will happen – he just needs to be up front with what he might be thinking. 

 

I hope this helps in some way. Good luck!! Stay strong!

Post # 71
Member
9520 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

View original reply
morningcoffee :  Some ladies bee crazy. 

(yes, a very lame pun. It is almost 4am)

Post # 72
Member
11517 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2014

This thread seems to have gone off course. I’m going to close this now for review.

The topic ‘I Was Sure My Boyfriend Was Going To Propose…But What He Did Was More Shocking’ is closed to new replies.

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