Post # 1
..and its dang hard! If you have read my other posts you will find out that (for reasons beyond my control) I went from planning a Sunday wedding with a reception site that was affordable and flat-rate for up to 200 guests (so everyone I knew could go) to a Saturday, somewhat pricey, room only fits 100 people reception… I don’t have family beyond 1 cousin and my mom so I can’t make the excuse that this will be a family-only wedding. I will have to pick among my friends. I am trying to figure out who I spend the most time with and work backwards from there, people I see once or twice a year (or my former college students) just WONT make the cut – and its not because I don’t want them there but because I CANT! Its a horrible feeling, because I don’t have the “its just family” excuse and I think they’ll deduce, so this is just for evalague’s “favorite” friends. =( Am I over-reacting. I have already read on here that having a shower or e-party for people who won’t be invited is NOT a good solution. What is?
Post # 3
Honestly, there is no good way – no matter what you are rubbing it in their faces that they are not invited to the wedding. And you can’t invite people who aren’t invited to the wedding to pre-wedding celebratory events.
I don’t really know the situation but you still have a lot of time, can you find another venue so that you can have all the people you want to share your day with you?
Post # 4
Get used to telling people that you and your FI decided to – or are having – a small wedding. That’s all you have to say. Practice in front of a mirror. People who are not that close to you won’t expect to be included in a small wedding. You don’t have to tell them you don’t have a lot of family… or go into any other sort of explanation.
I used the birthday rule. If I knew and celebrated your birthday – you were close enough of a friend that I’d invite. If I knew and didn’t celebrate your bday – you were probably cut. I’m a big bday person/celebrator, so this worked for me…. hope it’s helpful for you!
Post # 5
@FMM: No, I can’t, I already have a deposit down on the location and it’s non-refundable. Plus, it was hard enough to find a decent place within my price range that allowed that small of a wedding – or that wasn’t booked 1.5 years in advance ! The switch from Sunday to Saturday cost me alot of options =(