I wish ppl would stop asking "When are you getting engaged/married?"

posted 2 years ago in Waiting
Post # 47
Member
151 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2019

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gagal2016 :  I’m with you. My SO(now FH) and I have been together over 8 years, so we are used to getting the question. We wanted to do it for us and a way that was us. I make the joke all the time too and in 2017 caught the boquet at my best friends wedding. 

I get the humor and have made those posts too. You are on your own journey and it’s all in your own time anyway! Live it up, laugh it up. We joked about getting shirts that said “you can stop asking, were getting married ” for his family Christmas. 

Post # 48
Member
2032 posts
Buzzing bee

@gagal2016: I kinda figured you would because it’s not something you want to hear lol. I’m not here to attack you just wanted to give some honest feedback so it may have come across a bit harsh which wasn’t my intention

Post # 49
Member
2375 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

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gagal2016 :  If you really and truly believe that a proposal is coming and you’ll be engaged within the next few months, I think these comments and questions should be fairly easy to ignore. I wonder if maybe the problem is you’re not entirely convinced you won’t be disappointed, and these comments just feed that anxiety.

 

Did you ever tell him you wouldn’t be comfortable with him coming along on your family vacation this past fall?

Post # 53
Member
2375 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

 

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gagal2016 :  Well, I hope he understands just how stressful these last few years have been, and can be honest with you regarding his intentions. I understand there are some additional factors at play, but your emotions have really been through the wringer with this guy.

Post # 55
Member
1502 posts
Bumble bee

It really sucks how sometimes it feels like a women’s worth/achievements is measured by her marital status. My cousin has incredible achievements in her career and buying property on her own etc, but only ever gets asked this question at every single family event. I too was asked constantly until I got engaged, even though I felt too young and pressured up to that point, it made me feel crazy! It’s so demoralising. Sorry no helpful advice to add but I completely understand how you feel. 

Post # 57
Member
1502 posts
Bumble bee

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gagal2016 :  Yes I met my now husband at 19 so we dated for a very long time and we got that. I have now made a vow to myself to never ask another woman about marriage timelines because it’s none of my damn business! Lol 

Post # 59
Member
1591 posts
Bumble bee

My grandparents asked one of my exes when he was gonna propose after he was over for dinner like 2 months into our relationship. He awkwardly laughed and I actually laughed (because what a ridiculous question). It didn’t bother me because I wasn’t concerned, and I continued to laugh off the question when family asked. Just shrug off the question. The posts and the t-shirt and the whatever draws attention to it. 

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