Ickiness with FI and family

posted 4 months ago in The Lounge
Post # 2
157 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2019

sbl99 :  I’m sure he was just proud and they should be able to see that was all it was. Especially if it’s very new. My FH doesnt always think of things like that either and sometimes makes comments I think are braggy, but I doubt everyone has the same feeling or picks up the same nuances. 

I’d let it ride and if anyone does say anything (that would be equally uncouth) then just state that he is so proud and did not realize how it may come across. Just let it be 

Post # 3
2917 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2018

Don’t say anything, just make sure it doesn’t happen again

sbl99 :  

Post # 4
177 posts
Blushing bee

It is incredibly rude to bring up your salary.   I hope he understands that it is not just “icky”.   Hopefully, this is a lesson and he will learn to hold his tongue.

Post # 6
83 posts
Worker bee

It depends on your type of family. In mine, my parents brother and I all talk about money.. I’ve always known my parents salaries and we would discuss promotions, new jobs and the money that comes along with it. My husband has a very good income and he works his ass off.. he’s proud of his achievements, as am I and in a family setting we discuss this and no one takes it as ‘braggy’. I’m a stay at home mum at the moment but when I was working, my family knew what my salary was. 

But to each their own.. some people just don’t like talking about it but I don’t think it’s a big deal! 

Post # 7
4692 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: January 2017

sbl99 :  I would stop thinking about it but definitely make sure that he doesn’t brag like that ever again. Fates can change really fast, job loss, sickness, etc etc and you never know what people are going through at home- maybe some of those people are worrying about how to pay their light bill. Some sensitivity training and humbleness would do him well. 

Post # 8
1957 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: March 2019

Yeah, both sides of my family celebrate promotions and a “fiance just got a new job and a big promotion!” Would have been something to celebrate, but never would we have hinted how much money was coming in. My hubby was very proud of me when I got my new job and promotion, but would have never hinted at how much extra money I was making. As long as he doesn’t do it again, I think its fine. No need to apologize, just make sure you know how him talking about it like that makes you feel. Its one thing to celebrate the new job/promotion, its another to hint at how much extra money is coming in multiple times. 

Post # 9
1891 posts
Buzzing bee

The more you bring it up now after the fact the more attention you are calling to it. Leave it be and now your fiance knows its not something you want discussed openly. 

Post # 10
647 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2017

Maybe my idea of salaries is skewed by the mining boom etc but most working couples I know are paying the levy and are on over $180000 combined. It’s a good pay, not FANTASTIC (unless you are very young, then its great) and unless his family are not working or doing it hard, most probably thought the bragging was a bit over the top lol. 

Leave a comment

Find Amazing Vendors