Post # 1
I am going to scream! We were at DH’s dads house yesterday and they know we are TTC. I was venting about how nothing is working (they didn’t know about my issues and that I am on fertility medication and seeing a specialist) and they kept saying to just relax. Well I went ahead and told them that we are seeing a specialist and I am not responding to any of the medication. What do they say after that? Just relax!! Argh! If it was only that simple!
Post # 3
That’s usually why I keep it to myself that we are TTC. And I hardly ever ask anyone when they are planning to have children. It’s not helpful to hear, “Just Relax! It will happen” when you’ve been trying for so long and nothing is happening!
Post # 4
You could do what my coworker said worked for his wife–he got her real drunk so she “finally relaxed” and then, voila, knocked up after 3.5 years of trying,
Post # 5
We have been very open with family members and our close friends because we knew we would have a hard time TTC and I want more people to understand what it is like to deal with infertility. But I am finding out that a lot of people just don’t get it. Luckily our friends have been really supportive and I can educate them on things they should and shouldn’t say to a couple dealing with infertility.
Post # 6
I hear ya!
Just as bad are the “it happened so quickly for me!” comments.
It really is so aggrivating. I can’t wait for your update today!
Post # 7
Sweetkate, I am sorry you are having so much trouble. Hang in there. (Hugs)
Post # 8
Yeah it’s annoying when people act like they know the solution to your problems, even if they mean well. What you really want is empathy and I’m sure they are just trying to provide words of encouragement, but it comes off as condescending if they take it a step further and give advice.
Post # 9
aww I really feel you! I hate that.. especially when its my husband. We also haven’t told anyone we are TTC, His sister kind of knows just because she has a newborn and she is always giving me the baby saying oh you need practice. She is like i can tell you are ready, you even are down to change his diaper. I wouldnt change her other 2 kids diapers LOL.
Post # 10
My cousin was having a REALLY hard time TTC. She also went to see a specialist and nothing. Then, they finally stopped trying.. and she “relaxed” and stopped thinking about it every second of the day.. and BAM! TWINS!!!! 🙂
Post # 11
The problem isn’t that any of us aren’t relaxed…In many cases, the problem is that we simply don’t ovulate due to medical reasons. It is hard for anyone who hasn’t been through this to understand.
@Babychka: Your cousin is a very lucky woman.
Post # 12
One of my 3 pregnant BFF’s always says that to me – oh, you’re only on round ____ – just relax, it’ll happen! Well, I didn’t get pregnant by “accident” because I forgot to refill my pill prescription. Some of us can’t afford the luxury to “just relax”!!!!
Post # 13
I hear you. Even more annoying are the women that document their pregnancies via multiple Facebook status posts a day about it. I am so tempted to “defriend” their a$$es. I get that they are excited, and I’m excited for them, but to post 25 updates a week that are pregnancy-related is some serious overkill. I am sure they have no idea how hurtful it is to those grappling with TTC but still, get a clue!!
Post # 14
@heathaah: Thank you! Not it is not just an issue with being “relaxed”, I hate that sterotype more than anything. “Well if you stop thinking so much about it, it will happen!” Sorry, not when you are not even ovulating.
I am getting the whispers and talking about from my Darling Husband family, but I am not open to talking to people about something so sensitive to me if they are going to be so hurtful.
Post # 15
I completely understand…. we are in our 3rd month of TTC… seriously if I here “just relax and have a glass of wine, it will happen” I may scream… If I took that advice I would be drunk or hungover all the time!