(Closed) If one more person tells me to “just relax”…

posted 7 years ago in Babies
Post # 3
Member
5977 posts
Bee Keeper

That’s usually why I keep it to myself that we are TTC. And I hardly ever ask anyone when they are planning to have children. It’s not helpful to hear, “Just Relax! It will happen” when you’ve been trying for so long and nothing is happening!

Post # 4
Member
14186 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

You could do what my coworker said worked for his wife–he got her real drunk so she “finally relaxed” and then, voila, knocked up after 3.5 years of trying, Tongue out

Post # 6
Member
3363 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2009

I hear ya! 

Just as bad are the “it happened so quickly for me!” comments. 

It really is so aggrivating.  I can’t wait for your update today!

Post # 7
Member
7771 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2010

Sweetkate, I am sorry you are having so much trouble.  Hang in there.  (Hugs)

Post # 8
Member
6661 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2010

Yeah it’s annoying when people act like they know the solution to your problems, even if they mean well. What you really want is empathy and I’m sure they are just trying to provide words of encouragement, but it comes off as condescending if they take it a step further and give advice.

Post # 9
Member
1221 posts
Bumble bee

aww I really feel you! I hate that.. especially when its my husband. We also haven’t told anyone we are TTC, His sister kind of knows just because she has a newborn and she is always giving me the baby saying oh you need practice. She is like i can tell you are ready, you even are down to change his diaper. I wouldnt change her other 2 kids diapers LOL.

Post # 10
Member
96 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

My cousin was having a REALLY hard time TTC.  She also went to see a specialist and nothing.  Then, they finally stopped trying.. and she “relaxed” and stopped thinking about it every second of the day.. and BAM! TWINS!!!! 🙂

Post # 11
Member
3363 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2009

The problem isn’t that any of us aren’t relaxed…In many cases, the problem is that we simply don’t ovulate due to medical reasons.  It is hard for anyone who hasn’t been through this to understand. 

@Babychka:  Your cousin is a very lucky woman.

Post # 12
Member
2226 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

One of my 3 pregnant BFF’s always says that to me – oh, you’re only on round ____ – just relax, it’ll happen!  Well, I didn’t get pregnant by “accident” because I forgot to refill my pill prescription.  Some of us can’t afford the luxury to “just relax”!!!!

Post # 13
Member
355 posts
Helper bee

I hear you.  Even more annoying are the women that document their pregnancies via multiple Facebook status posts a day about it.  I am so tempted to “defriend” their a$$es.  I get that they are excited, and I’m excited for them, but to post 25 updates a week that are pregnancy-related is some serious overkill.  I am sure they have no idea how hurtful it is to those grappling with TTC but still, get a clue!!

Post # 14
Member
1944 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2009

@heathaah: Thank you! Not it is not just an issue with being “relaxed”, I hate that sterotype more than anything. “Well if you stop thinking so much about it, it will happen!” Sorry, not when you are not even ovulating.

I am getting the whispers and talking about from my Darling Husband family, but I am not open to talking to people about something so sensitive to me if they are going to be so hurtful.

Post # 15
Member
146 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

I completely understand…. we are in our 3rd month of TTC… seriously if I here “just relax and have a glass of wine, it will happen” I may scream… If I took that advice I would be drunk or hungover all the time!

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