- 6 years ago
- Wedding: September 2012
The Backstory: I go to a very old grad school. Think founded-in-the-late-1600’s old. As a result, there are loads of bizarre schedules for essays/terms. One such quirk is that graduation usually falls on Mother’s Day. By usually, I mean that, when I brought it up with one of the professors, she said, “I think the school wins this one. Mother’s day is what, 100 years old?” I told my mom and her reaction was classic for my awesome mom. She said that seeing me graduate would make her feel proud to be my mother. Aww =]
My dad decided that we should throw a graduation BBQ after the ceremony because my mom, dad, and sister will be flying from FL to MD and that I should invite FI’s parents and a few friends. He said he’d be buying us a legit BBQ grill as a house warming gift. Sweet..
The Fight: My Future Mother-In-Law screamed at Fiance that I’m throwing a party to “steal” Mother’s day from her. I was in class when the 3 hr conversation transpiredApparently Mother’s day is the most sacred of holidays ever and I am crapping on it because my dad asked me to host a gathering for my family, a family coming to town for a graduation which has a date set in stone and not by me. Once Fiance explained my mom is coming to town she decided that we need to make it a graduation/Mother’s day party, or do something to honor our mothers after. My mom is appalled.
The real fight: When yelling about all of the Mother’s day crap, she started bringing up that we were wrong to spend Christmas with my best friend (and Fi’s groomsman) Brian. In her mind, we HAVE to spend all holidays with family. The absolutely obnoxious part is that they don’t care whose family it is. If we had spent Christmas with my family, she said that would be good. PS: Future Mother-In-Law was raised Jewish and self identifies as atheist. Future Father-In-Law is Protestant but still. What?
My Conclusion: She doesn’t believe that Fiance and I are or will be a family of our own. She is also determined to make my graduation all about her (and, somewhat about my mother, who is like, “She’s nuts”). There is NO reason Mother’s day has to be celebrated on Sunday. Fi’s parents live less than 1 hr away. I can’t throw my graduation party Fri or Sat because I won’t have graduated and my sister and parents will have to fly back to Florida by Monday for work/school/taking care of our remaining elderly dog. I was just so happy everyone would be there for me and nope, she craps on it. She consistently has to be the center of attention (cuts everyone off, including Fi’s dad, constantly)… I’m dreading her come wedding day when the focus will be on Fiance and me. I don’t think she can handle anyone else being happy.