If SO won't propose to you, have his brother do it first…He bought the ring

posted 5 months ago in Waiting
Post # 17
2560 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2017

sunburn :  ITA !

catqueen92 :  No one can talk an adult into doing what they don’t want to do!  He took the initiative and bought the ring now *despite* the issues you were currently having. That says he’s in it for the long haul.  He probably felt down because he knew he had fucked up and let you down. His brother was just the wakeup call that made him realise he was letting a good thing (you) get away by his own inaction. I am so very happy for you! Enjoy it and don’t overthink/or second guess it!

Post # 18
2169 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

jellybellynelly :  that’s exactly what I was thinking. But I’m glad you said it first :).

Post # 19
336 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2019 - City, State

I completely agree w/ sunburn. To hell with anything negative, this is your time now. 


Ehhh, don’t worry. Nudging a man a bit is really common … and I’m sure when he bought the ring, he took an action that felt like his own idea, and I bet he’s very proud. 

Just let it go, breathe – he’s doing what he wants to do, and a lucky man he is, too. 


Hope you enjoy every second! ❤️

Post # 20
121 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: July 2019 - City, State

Don’t feel bad about the situation! It’s human nature to compare ourselves to those around us, since we’re social creatures. If it had taken a near-death experience or something else to push him to action,  we would all be nodding our heads too. As long as both of you are sure and happy, don’t psychoanalyze the fun out of the process. 🙂

Post # 22
9541 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: March 2014 - Chicago, IL

Yessssssssss! Congrats!

Post # 24
212 posts
Helper bee

Hope it all works out for you.. there are some red flags though and you shouldn’t forget them just because you’re getting what you want. Congrats and good luck. 

Post # 28
1350 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2017

lemonsandlife71 :  +1 red flags abound in this thread and the other one. 

Post # 29
212 posts
Helper bee

catqueen92 :  it’s not that he has or hasn’t. It’s all the other stuff. I don’t need to give specific examples, but they are there and you know them. I understand you’re excited, but just try to keep a level head and realistic view of your relationship. 

Post # 30
687 posts
Busy bee

That’s a great development!

Although I must say I’m kind of confused…I thought the whole reason you were waiting was because you guys weren’t in love anymore and seriously working on the relationship as of maybe a few weeks ago?

Do you truly feel like you’re in the right place for engagement? I just hope he’s not suddenly rushing and being hasty because of his brother

Maybe he got the ring and will hold onto it until you guys are in a better place and have remained stable for awhile? 

I’m excited for you but I just want you to make sure he’s doing it for the right reasons. The last thing you want is a rushed engagement, you know? 

Hopefully it was just a matter of him realizing he was dragging his feet over nothing but just want make sure you guys are in a good place 

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