(Closed) If you are having 2 ceremonies question…

posted 3 years ago in Guests
Post # 2
Member
1607 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2016

So regardless of what you decide to do, the one most important thing…..make sure the guests KNOW they are attending a non-legal ceremony. Some people really have no interested in attending a “re-enactment” if it is not the legal portion. That’s fine and up to them, but those people will be so much more angry if they find out after the fact that you lied to them. So whatever you do, just make sure you are honest. 

As to where it should, figure out both of your VIPs and see where they would be able to attend and go from there. 

Post # 4
Member
441 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2016

I can understand where you’re coming from with having two separate weddings – my husband and I are both from different countries and we discussed organising our events this way as well. In the end, we decided to just do one ceremony and reception, since what was important to us was that the wedding was an opportunity for our families and friends to come together and this would likely be the only time this would happen because of the distance.

Personally, what I loved so much about my wedding was that it involved friends and family from both sides and (we hosted the wedding in my husband’s country) that my guests could have the opportunity to see where my husband is from. Having it this way for us did mean that some of our invitees from my country weren’t able to attend, but I think that would have been a reality either way (they’re spread all around the US, so travel would have been necessary regardless).

As for hosting guests the week before – I organised a tour of the city for our out-of-town guests and we hosted a barbecue at our place the day before to make sure we saw everyone. But that was pretty much it. I had put together a website with a lot of tourism suggestions for surrounding areas and in the months leading up to the wedding I received a lot of questions and helped a lot with bookings, but by the week before most people already knew what they wanted to do and understood that I was busy. It worked out great.

Obviously the final decision is up to you who you invite, but I loved that some of my really close friends were able to be there for me the day of the wedding and that they were able to visit the city where we live and meet our friends. There aren’t going to be many other opportunities for all the people you love to be there for you (most people won’t fly internationally for a birthday or baby shower or other milestone), so I really appreciated the fact that so many were able to be there at that moment.

Post # 6
Member
441 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2016

socalgirl1689 :  it was a combination of a couple factors. The most relevant is that it’s the city where we live, so planning and logistics were easier to take care of here. My hometown in the US is also relatively small, and it would have been necessary for guests to fly in to the nearest city 2hrs away and rent a car to get there. My family and friends are also spread out all across the US, so hosting it in my hometown would have been convenient for just a handful of people. In Belgium, we live in a city that’s easily accessible via public transport, and its easy to get from our city to other major ones (Amsterdam, Paris, London) so guests wouldn’t just be stuck in one place. We also talked to our guests and at the time of our wedding more Americans expressed interest (and ability) to travel to Belgium than vice versa.

but we also just had a civil ceremony (I’m not religious), so it could have worked out differently if we had a religious component to it.

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