Post # 47
I think that whatever you’re happy with, totally counts.
However, if we’re talking personal opinion, here is mine: I would entirely consider upgrading, if it was something that me and my SO did together. I know someone who swaps out her wedding set with a bigger, fake one from time to time; she has a few, and swaps them all the time. One set is real, that she used in her wedding & actual engagement, and the others are all fake stones that she just bought herself. If she and her husband went out and got a new ring together, or if he gave her a new one, that’d be one thing… but the fake ones that she bought herself kind of bug me. Like she wasn’t happy with what he’s given her.
Post # 48
@koveline: I have a few different sets I wear. I like variety. Why does it have to mean she isn’t happy with what he gave her? Some people just like jewelry. I don’t know what it is about this subject that brings out the sanctimonious attitude, it couldn’t possibly ever affect anyone else besides the person wearing it.
Post # 49
After your married your Engagement Ring is no longer and engagement ring anymore it’s now your wedding rings. You’re not engaged anymore so personally I think you would be upgrading your wedding rings by definitions alone.
I think this way because no one says this is my engagement ring and wedding band after marrage they say my wedding rings.
Post # 50
@KatyElle: Thumbs up to both your recent replies!
Post # 51
@KatyElle: I guess it came off as more judge-y than I intended it to… I just think that if it were my ring finger, I’d rather have a gift from my SO in that place than something I bought off the home shopping channel. I’d feel better about wearing an ‘upgraded’ e-ring, or another gift ring from my SO, on that finger than just something I went out and bought.
But I’m certainly not about to tell her, or anyone else, that it’s against the rules or that it’s wrong or whatever.
Post # 52
I upgraded my ring, Its easy for some pushy girl who insists her man spend far more than he ever intended to on the perfect ring before she will marry him to sit on her high horse and say ‘id never upgrade its not a real engagement ring’
My husband bought me a pretty little 0.2ct diamond, it was the setting I loved and I adored the ring. Recently someone he knew broke of his engagement and needed to sell his ring unknown to me my husband bought it very cheap and it was a stunning 0.5ct solitair, but he did not want me to have a big engagement ring on my right hand, so i swaped that diamond into my old ring. Most people have not even noticed, but I was so thrilled especially when he said, now you have the ring I always wanted you to have.
It is my engagement ring, except it is more special, because there are two magic moments from it, I still have my old diamond to and will set that in a solitair for my other hand when I have a baby.
Post # 54
Well my mother has had to change the setting of her ring a few times over the years as she got older, the first time because she realized that yellow gold looked better on her skin and the second time because she needed a setting that would work better with her arthritis. She’s kept the same diamond through all the changes and I know she and my father consider the sentiment to be the same. Sometimes a 60 year old just can’t wear the same ring a 20 year old was wearing, right now I can’t imagine changing my e-ring but we’ll see how I feel when I’ve got arthritis!
I think as long as when you get the change done it’s with respect for your relationship and love for your husband in your heart the sentiment is there.
Post # 55
Who cares? At the end of the day the only opinions that matter are the giver and the owner of the rings.
Post # 56
My parents got married with handmade silver bands. About a year b4 I was born, my mother got her diamond,which is how she refers to it. I had never seen Mother-In-Law with 1 until she came for the wedding, and than she had a huge rock on her finger. I got my upgrade 4 months b4 the wedding, DH did not repropose, but he insisted on putting it on my finger. Now IRL people see the ring being worn on the left ring finger with a wedding band and assume its an e-ring. What else could it be?
Post # 58
@teabiscuit: White gold settings get thinner each time they’re buffed- you lose some of the setting each time. White gold gets redipped because it is literally gilded and the white gold rubs off. Rings made of alloys all behave differently, but some other alloys also diminish in size and weight when buffed. Platinum does not reduce in size when buffed, which is why many jewelers consider it ideal to work with- buffing just shifts around the metal to blend away any scratches or dings.
Post # 59
I think upgradeing the stone or adding to the ring, still makes it your e-ring.
Don’t think I could ever get a totally different ring though.