(Closed) If you could do it all over again…

posted 9 years ago in Recaps
Post # 17
379 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

As many times as I said during planning that I wish we had just eloped, I honestly wouldn’t have liked that. The only thing I would ahve changed would have been my dress but the one I had was lovely and worked just fine. Otherwise everything else I would have done the same. ๐Ÿ™‚

Of course once my professional pictures come back I may be singing a different tune but for now I’ll leave it at that.

Post # 18
220 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

I would have been a little bit more clear about what I wanted in terms of decoration placement. I would have stood my ground a little bit more in regards to certain members participation. I would have test my bustle out a little better. I would have broken in my shoes more. I would have had a better idea of the time line. I would have stressed less about the stupid things. I would have had the DJ make announcements and then NOT start doing whatever he was announcing right away. I would have drank and eaten more. I would have stayed next to my husband more. I would have also NOT schedualed my hair appoint at 7 in the morning (or at least invested in some redbull)

Post # 19
894 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

I would NOT have done a destination wedding.  I would have done a smaller, local wedding.

It was the most stressful thing, way worse than I thought.  I basically had to coordinate the wedding, pay attention to 35 different people, and play travel agent, all week.  Even my friend who got married just a year before me said that she always wished she did a Destination Wedding, but watching me, she realized it was SO much more stressful than a “regular” wedding.

Post # 20
4145 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

I would have hired a videographer or specifically asked someone to tape everything. I’ll never see or hear my ceremony again, and you really don’t get the full experience when you are in it and in the moment. I would have drank a tiny bit less wine so I remembered more, I wasn’t drunk but buzzed enough by the end of the night that with everything going on it’s a little fuzzy. 

I also would have let the stupid things that annoyed the crap out of me go, and had a better attitude about it. The girls were late getting dressed while i was just standing there ready, and everyone was running all over and I was like COME ON. I hate being late and it was stressing me out. I should have just enjoyed it and said well whatever we’ll get there when we get there!

Post # 21
3765 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

Oddly enough, the day after our wedding I asked MrDane what he would have changed… his answer was he wished it hadn’t rained, but everything else was perfect.  His drunk mom, my drunk bridesmaids, my uncle (sober!) dancing like a fool all night, my sweaty palms during our vows, the fact that I stepped on his foot during our first dance, my sister’s ridiculous Maid/Matron of Honor speech (she got nervous, forgot what she wanted to say, and repeated “I love you guys” like 4 times)… all of those things are just lovely memories and I wouldn’t trade them for a cookie cutter day.

Post # 22
503 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2012 - Iowa

Overall everything went great, but I’d still LOVE to do it again. ๐Ÿ™‚ To my husband of course.
The only things I would change is making sure my bustle was done right and probably a different signature drink since our bartenders forgot the sprite in our rum-sprite-pink lemonade drink and it was horrible. I would also make sure to get a couple extra photos, I had a list printed out but in the hustle forgot to grab it.

Post # 23
1438 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

the only thing i would have changed if i could would be the weather, haha.  it rained in the beginning and was really chilly at night. 

Other then that i wouldn’t change a thing

Post # 24
1346 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

I would have made it clear that I didn’t want any black and white photography.  You can always turn a colored picture into a black and white picture, but going the opposite way is very difficult. I have about 10 pictures that I just wish were in color but they are black and white only.

Post # 25
2430 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2012 - The Gables Inn, Santa Rosa, CA

ETA: A bit more detail on my would-be changes…

I would have bought a cheaper dress. I loved my dress, but I think I could have done a lot more with that $1,000 if I had spent a bit more time searching and got a $200-300 dress instead. 

I would have not asked my friend to sing the first dance song, This was a disaster on so many levels– she decided she didn’t like the song, so she didn’t bother learning most of the lyrics, and spent all her time working on the 6 other songs she wanted to sing instead. 

I would have purchased less salad.  We had about 4 times as much as we needed, so my mom’s chickens got a wedding feast too– better to have too much than too little though.

And I would have not forgotten 2 very good friends of ours from the guest list.  I felt horrible for this one– they were on the initial guest list, then we tried to downsize to a super small wedding (<40 people) and then ended up bumping it back up, but they were never re-added– I felt terrible once I realized it, but it slipped my mind. 

Post # 26
96 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

I would have made a list of pictures I wanted and given it to the photographer. I told her over the phone the list of general things I wanted and thought I would just kind of direct her on the day of, but once the wedding was over I realized that there were things that I really wanted pictures of and I’m not sure if she took pictures of them (I don’t have the pictures back yet so I don’t actually know if she got all the pictures I wanted or not). I also would have talked to the guests a bit more, given a thank you speech at the wedding (meant to, but totally forgot), and made sure the DJ knew exactly what I wanted. I learned that even though you should trust the professionals you hire, it never hurts to go over everything just to make sure they know what you want.

Post # 27
51 posts
Worker bee

I would have taken pictures without my bouquet or at least had a smaller bouquet.  I felt like it covered up my dress.

Post # 28
1344 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2012 - Franklin Plaza

I would have hired a day-of coordinator! Certain things were overlooked and there was a lot of miscommunication about the things I wanted on the day-of. I really wish I had hired someone to coordinate with all the vendors.

Oh and maybe made sure my Maid/Matron of Honor didn’t get drunk before her speech. ๐Ÿ˜‰ But hey, it makes for a funny story now so maybe I wouldn’t. ๐Ÿ˜€

Post # 29
6580 posts
Bee Keeper

The only thing I would have changed was my hair person. I think she did a great job on the BM’s hair, but my mom hated hers and my curls came out by the time the reception started. My only regret.

Post # 30
2567 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

-Made our best man rehearse his toast in front of us. He never wrote one and it was a gory mix of flop sweat and stuttering. Very uncomfortable to watch and every guest noticed how unprepared he was. It’s definitely damaged his relationship with DH and I because we’re both a bit insulted that he’d not even take the time to write 3 sentences on an index card, especially given he knew we wanted him to make a toast about 8 months in advance.

-Cheaper dress, either a knock-off from one of the many bridal knock-off sites or something second hand. I loved my dress and I love how I looked but the price tag still stings

-Revised estimates when making the hotel block contract. We definitely factored the contract in when making our choice as our runner-up hotel didn’t require a contract, even for 30 rooms, but the one we picked truly was a better value for the guests. Happy with how it worked out but it was a lot of stress there at the end when we didn’t think we would make our quota

-Invited about 10 more guests, mostly folks that we’d been on the fence about. We were happy with our guest count being around 70 but could easily have gone to 80 or even 90 and a few of the people that didn’t get invites, I kind of regret not inviting

-Cheaper flowers. We got a deal from a friend of my sister who was a florist for 16 years and does wedding flowers as a side job now. While the flowers were stunning, and she did an amazing job, they were far more ornate and complex than we had needed, and while she gave us outstanding quality, we could have saved a LOT of money. I’m just not emotionally attached to flowers and I see that expense and cry a little.

-Interviewed DJ’s before choosing. A friend who does a lot of party planning for a huge corporation referred us to the DJ service she uses, and we picked from their talent portfolio based on DJ bios, video promo clips and the genres each specialized in. Our DJ was really difficult to work with, had never worked our venue, and lived too far away for us to reasonably expect him to visit the venue before the wedding. While most things turned out OK in the end, he added a LOT of stress in the planning process.  Just really crappy people skills. Would much rather have had someone else.

Post # 31
3354 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 1900

The only thing I would have changed was assigning someone to bring me drinks (water would have been fine) and snacks that wouldn’t leave food stuck in my teeth during the cocktail hour.  The guests were all drinking and munching and the wedding party got to enjoy appetizers and drinks too.  But I was in Every. Single. Picture.  So I didn’t get a chance to eat or drink during that time.  My Mom brought me a glass of wine and I got one sip before being whisked away for another backdrop.  A waitress asked me if I wanted an appetizer but the one she brought had too big of a chance of leaving flecks of food bits stuck in my teeth and that wouldn’t have been pretty. 

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