(Closed) If you could do it over again? Would you take cash or the wedding?

posted 5 years ago in Money
  • poll: Money or Wedding?
    You only get one chance at a wedding. Take the budget. : (56 votes)
    38 %
    20K is a good chunk of money to start out on. Take the money. : (90 votes)
    62 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    215 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: May 2014

    I would take the money and start a life together. Have a small dinner with close family to celebrate the new life:)

    Post # 4
    Member
    199 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    @mousepeach:  20K, for sure.  Honestly if you aren’t gung ho to have a big wedding you probably shouldn’t have one even if there’s not a check waiting for you.  I think they’re stressful even for people who love big weddings!  That’s from the biased perspective of someone who is having a tiny cheap elopement despite no one offering me 20K to do so 😉

    Post # 5
    Member
    533 posts
    Busy bee

    We were given something similar. My husbands (eeeee!) folks have us a huge amount of money and said “Use this on the wedding, the honeymoon or buying a house” We’ve used it for all 3. 

    Post # 6
    Member
    473 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: September 2013

    Money. Always the money. I wish I was in the midst of a house purchase and not wedding planning.

    Post # 7
    Member
    11752 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: November 1999

    For the right amount of $ I’d take the cash.  The “right” amount differs from person to person.

    Post # 8
    Member
    3101 posts
    Sugar bee

    @mousepeach:  Our wedding cost half that!  But I would still take the wedding.

    Post # 9
    Member
    1902 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: July 2012

    We did an absolutely amazing wedding for about $8000, so I would probably take the money, do a budget wedding, then use what’s left over for a house deposit or holiday.

    Post # 11
    Member
    10572 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: January 2011

    My Dad half-jokingly offered this.  At that point we had 0 income, we were both students.  My Mom would have been crushed.  I loved our wedding!  For me, having the wedding was a one time thing.  We’ll have many opportunities to save.

    Post # 12
    Member
    688 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: July 2012

    Money. Hands down the money.

    Post # 13
    Member
    9575 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: September 2013

    If my parents would have offered me cash I would have taken that and probably just eloped.  But my parents wouldn’t have just given me that much cash, they will pay for  the wedding reception though. 

    But yeah…if they offered that much and said either use it for a wedding or keep it, I would have eloped (invited them and FIs parents and a few others) and kept the rest!  I offered to have our wedding in Vegas to begin with but Fiance didn’t want to! 

    Post # 14
    Member
    2607 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: September 2011

    Split the difference.  Take the cash, have a tiny, beautiful wedding with just immediate family & v. close friends with a lovely dinner at a restaurant instead of a catered reception.  Dress up as bridal as you like, and celebrate with your nearest/dearest.  Hire a student photog, or get married on a weekday and hire a pro at their weekday rate.  

    Whole thing should be under 5K, leaving you 15K to start your life with.

    FWIW, I’ve done both.  I had a splashy, expensive wedding the first time around, and a tiny but glam elopement the second time.  Not taking the fact that I eventually divorced the first guy into consideration (lol), now that I’ve experienced both, I enjoyed the second, smaller one much more.

     

    Post # 15
    Member
    1657 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: August 2015

    @MissNoodles:  +1

     

    I agree with splitting the money. I would probably use $6-7K on the wedding, and the rest to help with a down payment on a house, or paying off student loans.

    Post # 16
    Member
    722 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    I would take the wedding. It’s a one day that’s focused on you and your Fiance and celebrating your love for each other. I would rather have the memories of that day than money, money can’t replace memories! We’ll still have memories when we “start” our life togther, too, so the money wouldn’t be a want for me.

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