(Closed) If you kept your maiden name…

posted 7 years ago in Names
  • poll: How are you referring to yourself if you kept your maiden name?
    Ms. Maiden Name : (12 votes)
    80 %
    Mrs. Maiden Name : (3 votes)
    20 %
    Oh crap, I hadn't thought of this! : (0 votes)
  • Post # 3
    Member
    2392 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: September 2011

    @brideatbeach: Ms. Maiden Name is the correct term, especially for work.  I’ve been taught work-wise that no matter what a woman’s marital status or what name she is going by, Ms. is the appropriate professional salutation.  Ms. isn’t an abbreviation for Miss (which doesn’t hae an abbreviation), it’s basicaly a status-neutral title, like Mr.

    ETA: I’ll occasionally address a letter to a married or widowed older (70+ or 80+) woman if I know her and think she’ll appreciate it, but basically when dealing with people for business purposes, everyone is Mr. and Ms. At my previous job, we had a departmental meeting talking about basically this, and not signing our letters to clients with “hugs and kisses” or dashes instead of a business-appropriate signoff.

    Post # 5
    Member
    2392 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: September 2011

    @brideatbeach: No, problem.  Sounds like you had the right instinct.  I added my ETA because the way I learned this was the most ridiculous meeting ever where they brought out copies of actual client correspondence and were like “what is wrong with you people?!”

    Post # 7
    Member
    2161 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: July 2011

    I had to ask my mom this when doing my invites.  She is Mrs. Maidenname and is also a professional. 

    Post # 8
    Member
    2392 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: September 2011

    @brideatbeach: I think as a teacher you have a little more leeway to go by whatever you want, just as you do socially.  I work in finance and basically everyone is Ms. at work no matter what you go by elsewhere.  Basically, it is always correct to go by Ms. no matter your marital or name status (that’s why we have to use it in business correspondence).

    Post # 9
    Member
    131 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: January 2016

    I think if you go by “Mrs. Maidenname”, people will assume that your husband is Mr. Maidenname – not that it matters really.  I am not married yet but will just use Ms. for everything.

    Post # 10
    Member
    3142 posts
    Sugar bee

    In Quebec, where I will be living after I get married, it is illegal to take your husbands name.  So a lot of my French friends have told me that the husband often gets referred as Mr. Wife’s Maiden name because a lot of the times the wives go by Mrs. Maiden name (only in French :P)

     

    Post # 11
    Member
    5096 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: June 2011

    Yep, I just stuck with “Ms.”  As Entangled said, it doesn’t connonte marital status – it’s the feminine equivalent of Mr. 

    The topic ‘If you kept your maiden name…’ is closed to new replies.

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