Post # 1
i have a friend who i know wont make it to my wedding – shes in london (my hometown) and the wedding is in mexico (where i live). Shes doing a second degree so has explicitly said she wont have the money or free time to attend
ive heard some people think you should send an invite anyway, so they know you want them there? do you agree?
Im only doing a very small batch of invites for english people as the majority of people will be coming from mexico (so the other invitations would be in spanish).
would people really mind not receiving an invite to an event they definiely cant attend (i have other friends who are teachers who cant travel during term time even if they wanted to)
i also havent quite figured out the logistics of getting invites to england – it seems impersonal to have my mum handle all the english ones, but then if i post them from here chances are theyll never arrive…
Post # 3
I’d still send her one and tell her that you’re going to send her one but completely understand that she probably won’t be able to make it, but are sending it to her anyway.
Post # 4
Yes, you should still send her an invite.
Post # 5
We sent invites to those who told us they couldn’t attend. At least one couple has changed their response, so I would definitely send a formal invitation–you never know!
Post # 6
I would still send her one. If one of my close friends didn’t send me and invite I would be SO HURT. Even if I knew I couldn’t attend.
Post # 7
@newname_99: I also thought it would be strange to send invites like that, as I worried it would seem gift-grabby, but I’m glad I did. DH’s stepsister (who I knew wouldn’t make it as she was due to have a baby about two weeks before our date) apparently thought our invite was so cute she put it on her fridge and was glad to be included! So I say yes, send away!
Post # 8
I have a few people that I know are not going to be able to come that I am still going to send invitations to anyway. I’ve come to know them as “courtesy invitations.” Here is the way that I look at it-
Say your best friend is getting married, but you tell her that you are not going to be able to come. But she doesn’t send you an invitation. You say now that you would understand, but you start to question, “Did she really even want me there if I didn’t get an invitation?”
Also, I wouldn’t mistrust international mail. I have mailed out things for more than one client overseas and just always make sure that I put insurance on them. It’s an additional $2-$5 to add it usually.
Post # 9
Yes. It’s just the courteous and kind thing, to let her know that you still think of her and, under better circumstances, absolutely would want her there.
Post # 10
Yes. You never know, circumstances may change.
Post # 11
@iarebridezilla: well thats exactly it, i dont want them to think im trying to get a present out of them!!
i guess i will send them out then, its not like its going to cost me anything (well, literally it will cost me a little bit, but not much)
Post # 12
i would send her an invite too. that way she doesn’t feel left out even though she can’t come.
we were in mexico and we sent invites to england. (the wedding was in canada). we knew that they were not going to be able to come but they were so pleased to still receive the invite.
suggestion for mailing: i don’t know if the regular post mail system would be that reliable from mexico to london but the parcel delivery service can be. we just ordered something from england and it was delivered to our home in mexico in less than two weeks. i was shocked. can you put all of the invites to be delivered in england in a parcel and ship it with ups or fedex or dhl to your mother or family member. then she can open it and drop the invites in the regular post for you. perhaps the rsvps from guests there can go to your mother (that’s what i did) or they can be simply emailed.
Post # 13
@mypinkshoes: yes i think that might be the best solution
ive never tried to send anything to london from mexico,but my family have previously tried to send things in the other direction and they never arrived – birthday cards, a thankyou note for a wedding gift and other things. still dont know what happened tot hem!
Post # 14
Yes, I did. It’s nice to feel included even if you can’t be there. We knew full well several of DH’s friends were going to be deployed and still sent invites to Afghanistan for them anyways. They appreciated it and thought it was sweet even though we knew they couldn’t possibly come.
Post # 15
Yes, still send someone an invite even if you are sure they cannot attend.
Post # 16
@newname_99: my sister (canada) sent me a christmas card last year at the beginning of december. i got it in february. lol. i wouldn’t send anything in regular post but i would send it by a courier company that needs a signature upon receipt. are you sending a lot of invites to london?