If you were proposed to without a ring, would you be ok with it?

posted 3 months ago in The Lounge
Post # 16
Member
92 posts
Worker bee

I would say hell yeah and we went ring shopping together later 😂 But if I were not to get an e-ring at all I will buy myself something to wear on that finger that’s it

Post # 17
Member
111 posts
Blushing bee

Ring nowadays is a symbolic. My parents, Sister and few family members, they were proposed to without ring. 

after marriage  they only wear wedding band. 

Post # 18
Member
931 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: City, State

No, I wouldn’t be okay with it.  

Post # 19
Member
541 posts
Busy bee

Sure. I was. Well, I proposed, but he didn’t have a ring because he knew I didn’t want one. I find the tradition a ginned up way to get people to spend money on things that have falsely created non market tracking value, and I don’t want to contribute. I’ve been married for awhile now and I remain very glad for no ring!

Post # 20
Member
526 posts
Busy bee

The engagement ring is really big thing in US but other countries it’s not considered as big of a deal. Even in Europe the rings are smaller. Lot of Asian cultures have no concept of wearing an engagement ring or wedding ring. Even in my own culture while now more and more people are getting engaged with rings majority of them don’t wear them on daily bases and only for wedding events. 

Post # 21
Member
871 posts
Busy bee

I would absolutely be okay with a proposal without a ring. 

I wouldn’t be okay with a proposal from someone who seemed reluctant to set a wedding date, even with the most gorgeous ring. 

The main ingredients of the best proposals are love and sincerity. 

Post # 22
Member
2395 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2016

Hmm. I had never really considered it.  Idk. For me, I guess the ring is where it all became real. Before that, we were just talking.

Post # 23
Member
694 posts
Busy bee

Yes of course! 

The ring is just a piece of jewelry. I’m spending my life with the man. 

Post # 24
Member
224 posts
Helper bee

Hmmm. My dh and I talked about getting engaged and then we picked out a ring together and I loved that. Is he taking her ring shopping? Or are they just wearing wedding bands after they get married? Personally, I would want an engagement ring. 

Post # 25
Member
335 posts
Helper bee

Proposed without a ring? No problem. But I’m not gonna lie, I like that piece of jewelry of my finger and if he said something in the lines of “i don’t care how much you want it, you’re not getting a ring because I don’t think it’s important” that would be another problem.

Post # 26
Member
3446 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2017 - City, State

We got engaged without a ring and it was totally fine. Didn’t have a proposal either. We got the ring months later. What mattered was our decision to marry each other. All that other stuff was not necessary for us to make our engagement official.

Post # 27
Member
1020 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2019

I would eventually want a ring but I would understand if he did it spontaneously b/c the moment was perfect, or because he wanted me to get the exact ring that I wanted.

Post # 28
Member
101 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2019

Nope, would not be disappointed at all. Even though I didn’t have an engagement or an engagement ring, husband and I decided to get married at the courthouse through text. It was mutual and we went to the courthouse two weeks later! 

 

Edited to add that I do wear an “engagement ring” with my wedding band that I picked out after we were married because mybfi her felt like it was missing something with just the band 

Post # 29
Member
2299 posts
Buzzing bee

would I be okay being engaged without a ring? absolutely. would I be okay with telling people I was engaged, only for them to look at my finger, not see a ring, then not take me seriously? no. 

while I totally feel like a ring is just something to show your relationship status and has very little meaning in the grand scheme of things, I’m not gonna sit here and pretend like I don’t care about living up to social norms, and like it wouldn’t make me feel insecure to have others think less of my engagement at first glance because I don’t have a ring.

tl;dr: a ring isn’t required during a proposal; however, I would have to buy something to wear on my hand just to avoid the weird social interactions that likely accompany not having a ring whilst claiming to be engaged.

Post # 30
Member
281 posts
Helper bee

For me I don’t think a proposal would come at a complete surprise. I think every couple should discuss the idea of marriage and other life style choices before anyone gets down on one knee. I’m personally not into making a lifelong commitment within at least the first couple years of a relationship (to each their own though). With that said after dating for years I would expect the idea of marriage would come up and at that time I would have mentioned ring preferences. I’m not into clear center stones or spending a bunch of money on a ring so I’m not shy about speaking my mind when the topic arises since my idea ring isn’t a typical one lol. With all that being said, I would be dissipointed to be proposed to without a ring if we hadn’t previously discussed a barrier in getting one. I would be fine if we decided to delay getting a ring if finances where tight at the time or if we were activity saving for a big purchase.

But hey, that’s just my opinion and some people like a complete surprise so more power to them.

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