Post # 1
And wanted to be in a relationship, how would you go about it? (especially the older bees).
I know most of us on this site are married, engaged or dating seriously, but if you weren’t, how would you look for a mate?
I am asking because I still have a lot of friends and family my age and older (29) who are single but don’t want to be. In particular I have one friend who I talk to on a weekly basis and she’s constantly frustrated and down in the dumps because she can’t find anyone. Another friend tries everything and is always optimistic, but never seems to have any luck. As someone who’s been off the market for several years, I don’t really feel qualified to give advice on the subjet.
What would you do, ladies?
Post # 3
I for one am so relieved to not be in the dating world anymore and I truly sympathize with those struggling to find someone to share their lives with. My biggest piece of advice is to not rely on the bars (ended up with some pretty ugly frogs that way!) Instead I would focus on just really putting yourself out there – letting friends know you’re single and ready to mingle, signing up for a class, attending networking functions, etc. The more you get out and meet people, the more likely you’ll find someone pretty cool to hang out with.
I also would strongly recommend trying online dating… I tried it during my single days and it just took the pressure off! When you talked on the phone, you knew what the other one was looking for, it took some of the guessing out of it. I didn’t meet my Fiance that way, but I did have some luck meeting some really cool guys that way. I feel liek some people feel like only desperate people try that, but I think it’s becoming more mainstream that in years past. I tried eHarmony because I liked how much they screened people before matching them up.
Post # 4
When I was single and wanting to meet someone I went on match.com. Worked for me! I assume if I was single now for some reason i’d do the same.
Post # 5
I met my Fiance on Match.com. I’ve always had pretty decent luck with online dating sites, so I would definately recommend that.
Post # 6
I met my fiance through a mutual friend, so I think that meeting people through friends is definitely a good way to go, as I know a few couples that also met through mutual friends. But if I was still single, I wouldn’t be opposed to matchmaking or a dating site such as eHarmony. One of my old co-workers actually met her husband through eHarmony! I also think networking events and “mixers” are great ways to meet people too.
Post # 7
I would try Match.com or eHarmony. I’d also probably be part of the party scene again and go out to bars/clubs (although those might be more of a fling thing).
Post # 8
Online dating, without a doubt. That’s how I met my FI! I was in my early 30s with two young kiddos, going through a divorce, living in a suburban area with almost NO single people (just “shiny happy” families), I’m not from the state I currently live in and didn’t know anyone when I moved here, and I was (and still am) a stay-at-home-mom so I didn’t have the opportunity to meet people through work. Thank God for Match.com!! I was scoping out the dating pool on Match a couple month or so before my divorce was finalized, saw my FI’s profile, and made a mental note to contact him as soon as my papers were signed. 🙂 I was so relieved that his profile was still up when my divorce was over and I contacted him before anyone else! The rest is history. 🙂
Post # 9
i personally havent used one but im all for dating sites, i can think of a few people i know that have used them and are sucessfully in a committed relationship and one that is engaged.
Post # 10
If I were single I would probably be burying myself in social activities & trying to make friends (while being quietly optimistic about meeting someone).
But that is just me — because I like going out and doing thingslearning etc. & would be hoping to find someone like-minded.
Post # 11
Friends all the way! They know you better and they will be the ones to set you up with someone who they feel will be good for you. Next, I will go with the dating sites. I think they work for a lot of people and I will be willing to give it a try.
Post # 12
I would definitely try dating sites – I met my SO on lavalife.com!
Also, joining clubs and stepping outside your comfort zone is a great way to meet people. I met tons of new people when I joined our company softball team, and I’d never played softball in my life. But they were tons of fun and really patient with me.
Post # 13
I would go to friends’ parties (that’s how I met FI). But other than that, online dating. I’ve heard too many happy stories about match.com and eHarmony.
Post # 14
Honestly I think I would just end up being an old maid. LOL I feel like if I didn’t have my Fiance in my life I would just be by myself. I’m almost too old to be out looking for someone. Plus I have 3 boys and I have to be extremely conscience on who I’m around and who I bring around them. It’s just too much work. If I were single I’d end up smothering my boys until they’re all grown then maybe find a nice gentleman caller at the rest home.
Post # 15
I basically clicked all of the above except bars. I met Fiance when I was 30 so dated for YEARS while in that age ‘category’.. you have to just do everything! Meet people any way you can. I dated online, I went out, I made sure friends knew I was single (I HATED when people said to meet people through friends – I’d known these friends for years, if any of them had anyone to set me up with, they would have already), joined new groups through meetup.com, basically just did whatever I could without feeling burned out or desperate. I met my Fiance through a friend of a friend of a friend (seriously!) and almost didn’t meet him because a) that was too many degrees of separation and b) I was burned out from blind dates. But luckily I went and it worked out 🙂
Post # 16
Well my ex and I broke up about 7 months ago, and I’ve been dating my Boyfriend or Best Friend for 3 months now, so I’ve recently had to go through the single thing. I was absolutely not looking to get into a relationship, but a friend said that she knew this really great guy who happened to be moving to my area and he didn’t know anyone, so she asked if i could take him out and show him around. Well, it turns out he actually is so amazing, and we haven’t really been apart since we met. I also met my ex through a different mutual friend, so that route seems to be working for me.