(Closed) If you were to make an exception…

posted 6 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
2295 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

I would definitely be fine with any babies under 3 months being at the wedding (assuming I felt the mom/dad has some common sense and would take them out if they started fussing). I’d probably be okay with under 6 months. After 6 months, I think it’s reasonable for most people to get a sitter for the evening.

It would also have to do with if my guests were staying overnight, how far they had to travel, etc. If it was a close friend and I knew more about her nursing situation (if she could pump, if the baby was on formula, etc), I might have a little more flexible stance.

Post # 5
Member
524 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

I wouldn’t make an exception. If you make an exception for one child, you eventually have to make it for all of them! Six months is old enough to be with a sitter, and you offered one. If she doesn’t trust that sitter, maybe she can suggest a local relative/friend she does trust and you can ask them? But if she doesn’t feel comfortable with a sitter, she does not have to come. I’m guessing your wedding is childfree for a reason and I would want to keep it that way except for maybe VERY young infants (under 3 months!). 

Post # 6
Member
2892 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 1996

I definitely think you should make an exception. A 6 month old baby is unlikely to be crawling, and in my opinion a crawling baby is much more likely to be fussy because it wants to get down and explore.

Post # 8
Member
2106 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

Looks like you’re trying to be accomodating and she isn’t. I would not make an exception if you told other people they couldn’t bring their children. Imagine how they’d feel if she brings her baby. ANY disruption from the baby would make people bitter, “That baby comes and cries and I couldn’t bring my well-behaved 5 year old???” etc

Post # 9
Member
1659 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

@Woodstock:  I wouldn’t travel and leave my six-month old with someone I don’t know. Dirty Delete is two and we’ve never had a non-family member babysit. She should decline the invitation, or you should make an exception.

Post # 10
Member
3265 posts
Sugar bee

She is breastfeeding, so can’t just leave her baby, especially if she is travelling a distance to attend.

That to me is what would be the exception.  Breastfeeding, and travelling far.

It is not wrong for her to not want to leave her baby with someone she has never met.  Many parents wouldn’t be happy with that arrangement (the cousin may not be either).

If other guests complain, then THEY are rude.  And I would actualy call them on that. 

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