(Closed) If your FI hooked up with a stripper…

posted 6 years ago in Parties
  • poll: Would you still be okay with him going?
    Yes because... (explain below) : (37 votes)
    34 %
    No because... (explain below) : (71 votes)
    65 %
    Other because... (explain below) : (2 votes)
    2 %
  • Post # 3
    4109 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: December 2011

    No. Not at all.

    I think I would actually question his taste & health (as in STDs) if I ever found out he slept with a stripper.

    Post # 5
    8738 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: September 2011

    I think it’d be fine. That was when he was single, now he is in a relationship.

    Strippers are people too and can have loving relationships. 

    Just because she is a stripper does not mean she’s dirty.

    It sounds like they actually dated (hung out a few times and slept together a few times) rather than him getting sex in the back of the strip club one time.

    If he had met a girl who was a bartender at a local bar, hung out with her, and slept with her a few times would you ask him to stop going to bars?

    Or if he met a girl teaching a spin class, hung out with her a few times, and slept with her a few times, would you want him to stop going to spin classes?

    Post # 6
    155 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: July 2012

    I voted “No” but it has more to do with the relationship than the stip club itself – my Fiance knows that I detest strip clubs.  I think they’re dirty, I don’t understand the draw/desire, and it is completely beyond me why someone would want to look at a woman (who is only there to get their money) WITH other guys……weird weird weird.

    Luckily, Fiance is the same way (he went once with a group of friends, thought the idea was dumb and a waste of money)…….

    I guess it’s just weird to me.

    Post # 8
    4109 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: December 2011

    @carroll2bee:  Good! I wasn’t trying to insult your SO. I just hate strip clubs period. They gross me out.

    Post # 9
    1095 posts
    Bumble bee

    Everyone does silly things when they are single (and on the rebound), I don’t think your SO should be punished for something he did a long time ago. However, on the flip side, knowing that he could find a stripper attractive would make me say no. Personally, my Fiance is disgusted by strip clubs, so I’m not too worried about him going. But if I knew that he had previously hooked up with a stripper (knowing that she is a stripper; not like he met her somewhere else and had no idea what her job is) I don’t think I would be okay with it.

    Post # 10
    2651 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: May 2016

    I’m a minority on the boards, but yes I would be ok. If he hooked up with a nurse or doctor,would it be a problem for him to go get a physical?

    What about a gym instructor ?  No gym time? What about a concert ? Musicaican or fan is that still a problem.

    I don’t think it would matter to me , since my fi would have Been single and now he’s not . It depends ob how much you trust your fi.  I would talk to him though. Since If you are not comfortable with him going that’s fine too .  Tell him what you are ok with and what your not, ie, our rules are no touching period and no hotel parties. 

    Eta: don’t assume he KNOWS where the line is.  Guys plus their friends plus alcohol= stupid. Lol

    Post # 11
    3081 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: August 2012

    When Fiance was young and wild he did hook up with someone who happened to be a stripper, among a variety of other women. It never crossed my mind to be against him going to strip clubs probably because of his attitude towards them- doesn’t really enjoy them, waste of money, only goes when it’s for something with his friends. Now that you bring it up, I understand why you might care, but I don’t.

    Post # 12
    2916 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: March 1996

    @carroll2bee:  Wait, is it the SAME strip club where the woman he hooked up with worked, and does she still work there? That information affects my answer.

    Post # 13
    13014 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: November 1999

    I think I’d be hesitant, but I wouldn’t stop him from going.  I’d tell him my concerns, and let him make the final call.  If you’re marrying him, you probably already trust him, and he hasn’t done anything to break your trust.  If you’re okay with it, then it’s fine.  If you’re not okay with it, that’s fine too.  But you need to be honest with him about how you feel before the party, and figure out a game plan that works for both of you.

    Post # 14
    860 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: November 2012

    regardless if my Fiance hooked up with a stripper before he met me or not, i consider strip clubs cheating. So either way it would make no difference to me…. i made it very clear when we first started dating that i am against them and there has never been an issue…

    Post # 16
    1252 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: November 2011

    @KatNYC2011:  Agree, if he met a girl at work and slept with her would you be okay with him going to work?  If he picked up someone at the grocery store would he still be allowed to go there?

     He was single at the time, he met a girl, got her number, and later slept with her, this happens all the time in all kinds of places.   Not sure why it matters where they met, she wasn’t a prostitute, and plenty of women who aren’t strippers have Save-The-Date Cards so I don’t see how it is any worse than any of the other casual hookups he had during that time.

    The topic ‘If your FI hooked up with a stripper…’ is closed to new replies.

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