(Closed) If your other half eats badly, how do you stay on track?

posted 8 years ago in Fitness
Post # 3
Member
2015 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2009

I have the same problem. My husband is a bean pole. He can eat a plate of nachos and lose three pounds. I, on the other hand, can blow up by eating just about anything.

It’s not healthy, but I eat a lot of lean cuisine and smart ones meals, and then he’ll go ahead and make something more substantial, like a huge plate of pasta or mac and cheese. I find that having a meal I can heat up in three minutes deters me from just “having what he’s having.”

Post # 5
Member
532 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

I think that the number one thing that my Fiance and I do to help ourselves eat healthier is to go grocery shopping every week. We hardly ever eat our because we plan all of our meals in advance. We bring lunches to work, and when we eat together, we have a dinner planned so that we don’t snack or order pizza. Another very important thing is that we ALWAYS eat breakfast. We do allow ourselves treats, but not many. We may share a small bowl of low fat ice cream or frozen yogurt after dinner (Don’t eat right out of the container because it’s too hard to gauge how much you are eating that way). We also make a point to work out, sometimes together, other times on our own. During the summer, we go to our local farmer’s market together to buy our fruits and vegetables. It’s really about making small changes together. I never eat fast food unless we are taking a road trip and I don’t really have a choice. My Fiance takes way better care of his health now than when I first met him. As far as eating once a day, I would say that if you like to only eat one big meal a day than make your big meal your breakfast. It will give you so much energy. Then just plan several small meals throughout the rest of the day. Eating small meals is healthier anyways, and boosts your metabolism like none other. Good luck!

Post # 6
Member
188 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

I would somewhat agree with the above, keeping heatlhier somewhat easy to prep foods on hand so your not tempted.  Also, i’ll generally make meals of what I would eat, like grilled chicken, some veggies/red potatoes.  Which he will eat, but he wants more.  So then I also make a entire pot of Mac n’ cheese for him.  But I don’t eat it cause I have my meal ready.  And when he always wants fast food, I just get the grilled chicken sandwhich, it’s pretty safe at most places as long as you say no mayo.

Post # 7
Member
289 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2009

My husband and I have the same problem. I gained about 15 pounds during our first couple of years together and I managed to lose most of it in time for our wedding in September. It was tough but I got myself back on track (as I was pre-him)!  I cook him a full meal every night but make myself something different. I don’t do prepackaged because of the salt/sodium but for some people that might work. It’s way more work and costs more in groceries but it’s worth it because we are both happy.  I still “cheat” way more than I did five years ago, but I’ve finally found balance.

 

Post # 8
Member
224 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

I always eat a big healthy, fiber-riffic breakfast, and a small, nutritious lunch.  I build exercise into my day – get off the subway 1-2 stops early and walk, take stairs instead of elevator, do active work instead of seated work.  Then, if I want to splurge at dinner with FH, it’s not so bad.  He usually cooks, and has been making our portions smaller, so dinner is generally reasonable.  I also encourage him to do most of his piggifying on nights when I work late or on the Saturdays I work. 

The problem?  I look great (have gone down 2.5 sizes since we met, though I was at my heaviest then, then got sick, but have kept it off and lost more)….he has gained about 15-20 lbs, and I’m….oh man, I feel like such a bad person….less turned on because of the love handles and man-gut.  He drinks a lot of beer, which doesn’t help.  And no one likes to be told that they are getting fat and less attractive, I know I would HATE THAT.  *sigh*

Post # 9
Member
2006 posts
Buzzing bee

Simple. I cook one healthy meal for the night and if he doesn’t want to eat it then he can cook himself his own meal. I was raised in a house where mom is not a “short-order cook” and if you didn’t like what was served you could go to bed hungry 🙂

To be fair, I make a meal plan every sunday and we go over it together before we go grocery shopping so its not like he doesn’t get any input on what he will be eating for the week.

Post # 10
Member
164 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

Ughhh I feel your pain, girl!  I’ve gained about 20 pounds being with my Fiance as well!

 

I actually ended up going to a nutritionist and she gave me great advice.  My Fiance is a total snacker!  Before I met him I had cut out snacks completely from my diet.  But because he snacks…I snack.  I have zero willpower so if I see snacks around me I eat them!  Anyways the nutritionist told me to have him only buy snacks that I don’t like, that way I won’t be tempted.  I talked to him about it and we came up with a list of snacks I hate (salt and vinegar chips, popcorn, strawberry ice cream, etc) and that’s what he is bringing into the house now.  🙂

Post # 11
Member
761 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: January 2011

I had a similiar problem when I moved in with my Fiance, he has diabetes and eats on a multiple small meal plan so I was eating my normal meals plus his. So now I have to either just have something like carrots if I cannot handle him eating with out me.

Post # 12
Member
2513 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: December 2009

I have also gained about 10 lbs since I have been with my hubby. He used to be pretty big (I didn’t know him then) but then he went through a tough time and lost all the weight. Now he is a lot more conscious about what he eats, because he realizes how big he was and doesn’t want to be like that again. Since we’ve been together, I have made him more conscious about the need to eat whole grain bread, tortillas, etc, vs. white bread or flour products, and a few small adjustments like that always help. I think since we’ve been together he has gotten stricter in his diet and I have gotten more relaxed! (that’s not good, I know). He actually has a smaller appetite than me, and when we go out to eat he will usually end up leaving half of his food on his plate and I feel like a cow because I’ll eat all of mine lol. We try to be more conscious of what we eat individually and as a couple, but I’d still say it’s only half and half. We could really stand to eat a lot healthier, which is something we are continuously working on and not really easy. Healthier food is typically more expensive and requires more prep time, and sometimes we just don’t feel like cooking.

Post # 13
Member
1260 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

Congrats on taking the steps to eat healthier! It sure isn’t easy. I would suggest getting your Fiance on board with your healthy eating plan. This needs to be a team effort. I used to work as a weight loss counsellor, and I remember lots of women coming in and complaining because they had to make a separate meal for themselves separate from their family. This is crummy for a number of reasons! First, eating together should be something you enjoy, and eating healthy is something both of you can do together. Meal plan one day a week, and buy your groceries according to those meals. Your Fiance can only eat unhealthy foods if unhealthy foods are available in the house 😉 Get him on board, and this will be a lot easier on the both of you. And remember, it is okay if you slip up. No-one is perfect! Good luck to you!

 

Post # 14
Member
6597 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2010

My Fiance is on track with my healthy diet when it comes to meals… which is great!

But the challenge for us is he likes to have junk food in the house for snacking. My theory is if it’s not in the house I can’t eat it and I have a horrible “salt tooth” so if chips etc. are in the house I WILL eat them!

So I have found snack foods that he likes (Roast Chicken, BBQ, or All Dressed chips and sour candies) but that I am not tempted to eat because I dislike those flavors.

Luckily I have a REALLY supportive Fiance who is willing to forgo all other snacks and stick to ones that I don’t like and it works for us.

Post # 15
Member
3564 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

Ditto what others have said…I try to only buy healthy snacks (baby carrots, fat free pudding cups, lots of fruit). I’m pretty much the only one who goes food shopping, so it won’t get into the house if I don’t buy it. So that helps. But I have also gained about 10 pounds since I started dating my Fi (mainly since we moved in together). Some of that was needed weight, but a lot of it is due to eating out a lot and eating more carbs–I never ate pasta before I moved in with my Fiance, but now sometimes I’ll make it for dinner because it’s easy and fast.

I try to deal with it by exercising at least three times a week. When I’m working out regularly, I feel better about myself, and also can indulge a little bit in less healthy foods.

Post # 16
Member
1104 posts
Bumble bee

I am lucky in that Darling Husband is just as interested in being healthy as I am, perhaps even more so. Neither of us are “lucky” in that we both have to work hard to stay in shape, lots of exercise and decent food. We both feel much better for it and like that we’re entering married life in such great shape. I don’t agree with one person cooking separate meals just bc I don’t agree with making life difficult for yourself – I do all the cooking and he gets what he’s given. He will have a bigger serving and often have a protein shake later to fill himself up a bit more (I’m a vegetarian so he uses the protein shakes to replace the meat in the meals a lot). The other thing we do is we don’t keep snacks or sweets in the house. Neither of us has much willpower and it’s just easier to not have them there at all. I don’t know how I’d cope with someone who had a really different philosophy but then I’m not really attracted to people who don’t take good care of themselves so it probably wouldn’t have happened.

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