(Closed) I'm 32, married, and a teacher…is it worth it to try being fashionable?

posted 6 years ago in The Lounge
Post # 152
899 posts
Busy bee

Yes! Be a good role model for your students! 

Post # 154
95 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

Your outfit today was/is cute! You look casual yet still in charge if that makes sense. I really like the outfit combinations on this blog (http://www.outfitposts.com/), particularly when she does her one suitcase outfits. It really help me figure out how many different ways you could wear things to make them look like different outfits (and I in no way look like her….I’m about 5 inches taller and 100 lbs heavier but the inspiration still works lol). I just looked at what she picked then looked in my own wardrobe to see if I had similar cuts/colors/patterns etc. and altered some of it to what I was more comfortable with (for example here, you could switch out the dark heels for a dark paior of flats). It really helped me expand my outfits without really having to go out and buy more clothing. Hope this helps!





Post # 155
873 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

@peachacid:  OMG! You are not fat, round and ugly!!! The way you described yourself before I saw your pics, I was expecting to see some sort of…well..real fat dumpy girl…. and you’re NOT THAT GIRL!!!! You got alot to work with…just need some style tips!!!!!

Post # 156
3077 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

@peachacid:  First of all, I stalked your wedding pictures and you are beautiful!!  I’m sorry you have such a hard time picking out clothing.  I can definitely relate.  I usually try the exact outfits all of the mannequins have on until I have something that looks half way decent and just buy it out of frustration.  It can be such a tedious process!!

Is there a New York and Company near you?  I have found that I really like their clothing for work.  Right now they’re having a buy one get one pant event (and their pants rock.. and I have a booty!).  Their tops are cute too!  Give them a shot.


Good luck =)

Post # 157
3223 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2016

@peachacid:  the outfit looks perfectly fine on you today, don’t worry!

later tonight I will try to look at my fashion books and get some tips on what you should look for when you buy clothes/put together outfits.

I agree with many PPs, your self image is not accurate AND you are a cutie who just doesn’t see it quite right!

Post # 158
1556 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

@peachacid:  That is a great move! You tried one thing, decided you wanted to tweak it and then did! The necklace fits with the necklines and you’re playing with shades of blue!


I have totally stalked this board and read every post in the past 30 minutes and must admit this is a long response, but read to the end, please!

I, like you, have fallen victim to my own warped body-image before. I know exactly how it feels to go into a store, try on things that I like and have them look completely awful on me (to my mind). Give up, go home, cry, eat ice cream, have a bottle glass wine.

I have been there. I still visit every once in a while.

What changed?

Well, I had a roommate who was superbly fashionable, but was a bit broke and wanted to go shopping with me so that she could still have that retail therapy without spending a dime. I pushed back because I felt like shopping was a horrible chore full of self-loathing for me. You see, she could put any article of clothing on and it would fit & look good. I explained that it’s not as easy to shop for me. I’m tall & curvy. Waists sit in the wrong place, everything is too short and out of proportion, blah, blah, blah. But she insisted on going shopping, and that she would help me. This was a day that seriously started a chain reaction. She had an eye for fit, I did not. She had an eye for fashion, and I just had an eye for art.

We spent 4 hours shopping on a Saturday afternoon. I tried on what seems like hundreds of pieces of clothing. She started to understand my struggle, and helped me adapt how I looked at clothes. After trying on all the clothes, I started to have an idea of what looked good on a hanger, but not me, and what might look bad on a hanger, but great on me. I bought a total of 2 pieces of clothing that day. And those white shorts made me feel like a million bucks every time I put them on.

That trip taught me to just be patient. Try on a bunch of stuff. And have someone else with me to give me an opinion or go search for something different.

That was my breakthrough.

Developing a sense of style is what happened after that.

I joined the wardrobe_remix group on flickr, took photos of my outfits each day and shared them with the group. It was a great group for inspiration and for sharing what worked for me and didn’t work for me. It’s a group made up of people of all ages, races, nationalities, and sizes with varied senses of style. It may give you something to look through that is real people and how clothing works on said real people.

One blog that I think you would benefit from reading:

Already Pretty

TONS of great body image & fashion & wardrobe advice on there. Seriously. You would benefit from a lot of the articles. I keep it in my blog feed as that constant reminder that I am already pretty, regardless of how my body fits into off-the-rack clothing.

Post # 159
2511 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: December 2009


Um, if you look like a “bowling ball” then I look like one of those comically huge beach balls people toss around on the beach.

Post # 160
2511 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: December 2009


By The Way, I too have horrible self-image & I’ve never been very fashionable. I’ve just recently started wearing scarves & I think I’m just WAY cool.

Post # 161
7371 posts
Busy Beekeeper

@chemistryBee:  That’s great. I’ll have to look into that. i’ve falling into a bit of rut. 

OP you are not a bowling ball as its been said a thousand times previously. 

Post # 162
3223 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2016


basically  to answer your question in your title… It’s worth it to become comfortable with accepting your body for who you are, to dress in a way that shows that comfort with yourself, because as some little person’s favourite teacher you are showing them -as a role model – the way the adults they care about think is right to treat themselves. 


As for body shape, the way you self describe makes me not sure exactly what your shape is. You’ve stated your legs are your largest part (pear shaped), bit also that you feel round (apple shaped).  I can’t tell by looking at your pictures which is more accurate, because the pictures you have posted are of you wearing clothing that really hides what is going on with you, figure-wise – but my guess is that you are either an apple or even almost a strawberry shape (inverted triangle) because you are actually a lot more slim on bottom than around the shoulders, at least in your first sweater picture. I wouldn’t say that you are fat at all. I would say that your figure is a little unbalanced, and the clothing you wear can work on that.

There are two fashion principles I would like to share with you: 

1) balance is everything.  if you are heavy on bottom, you can even it out by big, attention grabbing stuff on top. Contrasting colours (light undershirt, darker blazer/cardigan) buttoned in the middle helps to make your focal point (your middle) seem a bit smaller if they fit right.  Big pockets (top or bottom) make that half of your body seem bigger. It is okay to add some “size” somewhere, because it balances it out somewhere else.

2) start from the inside out. Your under garments are structure and support; for example, I’m wearing a skirt and tights today, and I really could do with a slip to stop static between them. the wrong bra won’t just fail to showcase your assets but will also do damage to the ligaments supporting your breast tissue.



Post # 164
2511 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: December 2009


OMG WHAT is wrong with you?! 

Why would you:

1) Say you look like a bowling ball?!

2) Say you’re not pretty?!

3) Say you have no style?!

You look GREAT!

Post # 165
454 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2013


“Every time we see a post like this, then the OP post real life pics, it is patently obvious that the problem is with your perception, not your body.”

Yep! I too thought you were going to be extremely obese. You are not. Also, there are tons of fashion blogs written by ladies who are much, much bigger than you, and yet they still rock great clothes. You can too. I think body image is your biggest problem, actually.  Also, identifying your body shape. You seem like the classic pear, which means you have a slim upper body and you *do* have a nice waist.

I know you won’t believe me, but I bet you’d look great in dresses and skirt. Snce you are self conscious about your legs, you’d probably feel best if you wore darkers colours on your bottom half and brighter colours on your top half.

Check out fullerfigurefullerbust.com and girlwithcurves.com for examples of ladies who are curvy and rock their fashions. You can too!

Post # 166
47202 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

@peachacid:  If you can’t shed yourself of this negative self image when it comes to your body, I suggest you see someone to see if you might have body dysmorphic disorder. At the very least, do some reading on the subject.

When you look in the mirror you are not seeing what is actually there.

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