(Closed) I’m about to blow up!!!! (VENT)

posted 7 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
1550 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

wow….

you know, you gotta pick your battles. you can’t get upset over every little thing, or else you are just going to wear yourself out. at the rate you’re going, you’re gonna get worn out real soon here.

 

Post # 4
Member
9029 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

Wow well sorry to hear she is frustrating you but I think she has a right to be upset if its your mistake for forgetting to put her card back in her purse. You should be going out of your way to get her card back to her. I’m not really sure why you took their card to pay for pizza in the 1st place. I havent done that since I was maybe 16….

Post # 5
Member
2190 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

I don’t want to sound rude, but I would feel kind of used if I was your mom. Most of these problems you have with her sound minimal. If you’re living with your parents, using they’re money to pay for things for yourself – maybe your mom expects more of you as an adult…my advice is  1. move out (and you already are going to do that) 2. apologize to your mom

 

 

Post # 6
Member
5797 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2011

Well, I’d be pissed at you if I was her. If you take something from someone it is your responsibility to return and yes we all make mistakes but you should still be trying to fix it (telling her to come to you is not fixing it). Its time to move out. Also, its none of your business how your parents use their money, they are not obligated to pay for your wedding.

Post # 9
Member
1550 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

It seems that almost half of your threads are big VENTS because you are super angry about one thing or another…

Also, you have a thread complaining about the fact your parents have been “procastinating paying for wedding” and a thread asking if “your diamond is too small.”

It seems maybe you are stuck in a bit of a selfish rut, and maybe you could do some soul searching to get out of your self focus. The world doesn’t revolve around you, and the world is not out to get you.

Post # 11
Member
19 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: June 2012

Wow. This sounds like one of those “emails/posts” that the events have JUST happened and once you calm down it’s gonna be okay! Sorry that you are going through all that. Calm down a little and it will all be okay 🙂 

OH and we are date twins!!! 🙂 Awesomeness. 

Post # 12
Member
2247 posts
Buzzing bee

@mrsdavistobe2012:  When you write stuff on here, just make sure to elaborate EVERY SINGLE DETAIL, or someone WILL jump to all kinds of conclusions and rip you a new one.  I had to learn that the hard way, too.

Anyway, I understand exactly how you feel about the mom thing.  I am sorry that you’re going through this stuff.  You’re probably just worn out from living with her.  Like someone once told me, two grown women absolutely CANNOT co-exist in the same home.  It’s like fire and gasoline.  I am confident that once you move out, you and your mom will be on the up and up again.  Just tough it out until then.  If you can, try spending a lot of time away from home, or keep away from your mom when she is home.

Last week, Future Mother-In-Law offered to pay for half of FI’s and my wedding.  I never asked her.  She just thought it’d be a great idea for us to have a fancy, plated meal style reception at a beach resort (so she can brag that *her* son had the best wedding of anyone else in the family).  Well, I can’t afford that on my own, and I wasn’t going to turn down her offer of help!  So, I began contacting venues regarding costs.  I found and picked the perfect place, at a relatively low cost. 

Of course, when I mentioned that I’d picked a place to Future Mother-In-Law, and told her about food costs, she acted like she’d never offered to pay a dime of it.  I know my wedding isn’t her responsibility, but SHE offered to pay so SHE would have something to show off to HER family.  Now, it’s like she never offered at all.  Yes, I am upset!  Who wouldn’t be?!  I am tired of people telling me they’re going to do something, then not going through with it. 

You have every right to be mad that your parents said they were going to something and didn’t go through with it.  If they’d said, “No, we can’t afford a wedding.”  In the first damn place, then you would’ve never expected it!

Post # 14
Member
686 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

@mrsdavistobe2012: CHILL! O__O

If things are seriously making you THIS angry THAT often – get help.

Post # 15
Member
2053 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

@mrsdavistobe2012: Hey lady, you just gotta move out which you are already doing, and over time that will help to smooth things over with your mom. Right now it’s clear she still controls and manipulates you with her words. Yes, you are still in her house and so this is expected, but you are resisting that, and so you experience this tension. The sooner you move out and truly stand on your own, the better for you and her. In the meantime, breathe, keep communication with her light and to a minimum, and continue to do as much as you can and then some to help around the house.

Post # 16
Member
5657 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: February 2012

I’d be pissed off too if someone used my debit card and then didn’t make sure to return it to me afterwards. You should be apologizing to her. It was irresponsible of you to forget to put it back.

You need to just move out… I think that would make both you and your mother a lot less uptight and stressed.

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